adopt a baby

I am crying all day. Recently I have problem with my fiance on adoption issue.

I have a daughter who is in high school already. He never has a child because of the fertility problem.We love each other, and are planing to get married in a year.

He wants to adopt a Chinese baby after our marriage. But recently China tightened the policy, and only allow a couple who has 5 years or longer marriage to adopt.That means that will be 6 years before we can adopt. We both are over 40 now. I think I will be too old to take care of a younger baby.

Plus my dream is too enjoy my life once my daughter goes to college after several years. I have many places in the list I want to travel to, want to see. I don't want to start all over again to take care of a small baby, to lose all my personal life. I have done that already.

I can not afford to lose him. I also can not afford to lose the freedom of the rest of my life.

What should I do? Any of you has small baby at a 40ish age?

所有跟帖： 

• 抱抱.别哭了..这种情况不要勉强自己接受另一个孩子,能好 -ggzr- ♀ (29 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:35:50

• Talk to him about your concerns. I am sure that he could -kathyzhang73- ♀ (81 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:35:58

• 仙女请审题,楼主说她不想领养孩子,因为她已经经历过抚养孩子 -ggzr- ♀ (51 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:39:54

• 哦， 今天我气糊涂了， 看贴也眼花， -kathyzhang73- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:42:24

• Adoption worries -purple123- ♀ (309 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:59:34

• 哎呀，你们俩个都有道理。他从没有过孩子，当然想要。 -菲妈妈- ♀ (74 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:38:42

• 先玩5年，然后领养。 -fanmit- ♂ (4 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:49:48

• 别人都哭啦!! -ggzr- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:51:51

• 40多了，女儿都上高中了，为了这点事哭哭啼啼，心理年龄小了点。 -fanmit- ♂ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:55:33

• 鲈鳗鲈鳗也！ 鲈鳗鲈鳗也！ -ggzr- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:07:23

• 要一边唱一边扭：） -fanmit- ♂ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:09:58

• 我不是泥蚯,你扭扭看....嘿嘿.今天又加班? -ggzr- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:13:47

• 呵呵，不上班也可以坐坐办公室，免费上网的说：） -fanmit- ♂ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:20:08

• 快上PP.你昨天答应的...证据见内. -ggzr- ♀ (160 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:24:24

• 呵呵，那好就炒炒冷饭吧：） -fanmit- ♂ (542 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:37:41

• ))= 5555555555555555 又被骗了 -ggzr- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:41:01

• 没赶上？ -fanmit- ♂ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:43:35

• 骗人，根本就不够5分钟呢。 -菲妈妈- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:43:13

• 图片较大，打开需要20秒左右。。。。。。 -fanmit- ♂ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:46:18

• 俺可以看见啊。。。。。。。 -fanmit- ♂ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:44:44

• 就一个完字。再来一遍吧？ -菲妈妈- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:46:17

• 按F5重看：） -fanmit- ♂ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:46:47

• 俺已经延长到30分钟了。 -fanmit- ♂ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:47:37

• 辣妈再把那个刷新一遍就可以看见了 -ggzr- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:47:04

• 呵呵，那个网站是免费的，性能实在。。。。。。。 -fanmit- ♂ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:48:38

• 这下看到了！多幸福的娇妻美眷啊！你怎么舍得离开？ -菲妈妈- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:50:13

• 没办法啊，穷。。。。。。 -fanmit- ♂ (18 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:51:53

• 是不是你心太高，要让老婆女儿过非常好的日子，才出来的？ -菲妈妈- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:54:20

• 估计是的...还可以顺便看MM -ggzr- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:55:07

• 呵呵，俺觉得国内美女密度比这里高多了：） -fanmit- ♂ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 15:02:29

• 俺家LD是在这里认识这里结婚这里生女儿的，刚送回去两年 -fanmit- ♂ (24 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 15:00:21

• 祝福！~~ -菲妈妈- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 15:28:02

• 我有个好主意,你何不带他去中国走走,带他到贫困的地区去看看 -ggzr- ♀ (206 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:50:42

• It sounds like a good idea. Thanks. -purple123- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:08:19

• 不客气,祝好运 -ggzr- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:10:58

• 小妞这点子出得不错 -kathyzhang73- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:16:44

• he loves the baby maybe it is not what you think when you really -windlove- ♀ (22 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:52:43

• 就是， 有孩子还是可以有乐趣， 不过等五年是长久些， 去越南或柬埔寨领养吧 -kathyzhang73- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:58:12

• 不一定要等五年吧? 我知道的有结婚两年就回中国领养的. -小妹妹~~- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:00:28

• 回复：不一定要等五年吧? 我知道的有结婚两年就回中国领养的. -purple123- ♀ (68 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:05:26

• why can't u afford losing him? you can always find a man -小妹妹~~- ♀ (33 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:52:54

• chinese baby is not the only choice for adoption -Viol- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 13:55:46

• LG有对意大利朋友夫妇，他们从中国收养第二个女儿的第二年， -慌乱的猫- ♀ (348 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 14:16:49

• I understand your feeling, I think having the same -gzlady- ♀ (1581 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 15:33:36

• Sorry, typo, expectation, not expectable :0 -gzlady- ♀ (0 bytes) () 05/26/2007 postreply 17:12:43