As soon as I got home, teary-eyed, I fumbled online to check out all the bridal outlet malls and online discount stores, hoping that I could find my gown in a size 0-2 petite. After numerous phone calls, I sadly realized that in this “land of abundance”, most stores don’t keep a size 0 in stock. And fat chance that I could find the design I was looking for. I then made an international phone call to a friend of mine in Shanghai who is in the clothing industry. I felt sure he would have some suggestions to solve the problem. Instead, he came up with the solution. One of his business partners operates a factory in Suzhou that gets special orders from an American bridal designer. He even told me that I could design my own gown based on a picture of a designer’s dress. That sounded extremely tempting! I don’t mind doing things differently. Why not get a gown designed just for me and no others?! On the internet, I found a picture of a white satin gown with a keyhole back and waist-length, flare-shaped sleeves made out of vintage lace. I requested that the long sleeves be cut short to my elbows so that the flare-shaped sleeves wouldn’t be too overpowering for my petite body. And I asked them put an extra layer of vintage lace on top of the white satin. The changes added a 1930’s glamour to the dress, which is exactly what I had been looking for. I then sent them my measurements. The new custom-designed gown came in less than five weeks, instead of the eternal 14 weeks that many brides in America would be kept waiting for. I even got a veil that matches the dress. And the cost for the gown, veil and shipping? Well, I saved more than two thirds of the price that I plucked down for the Maggie Sottero gown. Shame on the bridal apparel industry that prides itself on their ability to build our one-of-a-kind wedding gown! Shame on all those lies that they come up with to fool those prospective brides who throw down big bucks for gowns that take months to get back! As I later learned from my friend, those beautiful gowns are manufactured in a very unflattering manner. The long agonizing waiting period is not caused by the manufacturing process, which in my case, took less than five weeks for a very elaborately decorated gown. It is caused by the bridal manufacturers’ own procrastination. When an order is placed, they waited a while until they receive a certain number of orders for each size. Then they place the order in a sweat shop in China, where workers put out layers of fabric on a conveyor belt and have the machine finish many details. That mystery is never spelled out in any bridal magazine, because the fairy-tale image of a wedding gown is too brittle to withstand the truth. Brad and I went back to the bridal shop and got our deposit back. We picked out a day that we knew many brides would be shopping at the store. The owner was surprised that I would let go of her generous offer to give a discount on altering a size 6 replacement. “Altering a size 6 to a size 0 is not that hard,” she insisted. “There isn’t anything I can do about it because it really takes forever to make a dress like that, you know, they are made in China.” On top of that, I insisted that they should take the matching shoes back. When the owner resisted, Brad raised his voice a little bit and some brides who were shopping turned around and looked at us. He declared that he reserved the right to go to small claims court and recover all the “consequential damages” that we sustained as a result. “Hey, she spent $30 to do her nails so that she could take a bridal portrait. Now the gown doesn’t work!” With much reluctance, the owner finally made a refund. “Good luck with everything, I hate more than anything to disappoint a bride.” Sincerity was clearly lacking in her regret dripping with sarcasm. I finally have my gown now. After some minor inexpensive alterations, I had my bridal portrait that I had been looking forward to for months. During the photo session, I asked my photographer to shoot some pictures of me with my parents’ wedding portrait that was taken about a quarter of a century ago. My parents never had a wedding ceremony because they were married at a time when people in that far, far away kingdom didn’t have a chance. They went to a studio and rented a wedding gown, held an artificial bouquet, and took some shots. But they have been happily married for twenty-six years. I can only hope my marriage is as successful as theirs. It is not the wedding gown that makes for a good marriage. It’s the bride who wears it.
