When you get to know that your best friend gets promoted to be your manager, admit or not, part of you will feel jealous as the first response. Why him, not me? What has he done that I haven’t done? Is he a super apple polisher in disguise or what? Does he really deserve it?
Can’t blame you for all these groundless speculations and sour grapes. People always compete with each other. This is part of our daily life, part of our nature. The competition is more intense among people you know, most intense among good friends. You two started at the same position in the company and suddenly one has this new title, better pay, a nice office with door, while you are still slaving in the same routine work in the small cubicle and what’s more you have to report to him as a subordinate. Hard not to be grumpy.
But everything has its bright side. It is also a good time to think why your friend gets promoted, not you. Did he work overtime to finish some important projects before deadlines while you were slacking off or busy hitting on the newcomer hottie? Did he come up with some original strategies to help the company hold gains despite the competitive market? Or how did he communicate so successfully with your boss (or in your words – how did he suck up so well?). You can look to him as a positive example you may want to follow for your own career advancement. Learn from him, apply what you’ve learned to your day-to-day work life, and pay your dues and one day you will also be paid off big time. Stuck with a bunch of loser friends, you may never feel this kind of jealousy because you are just one of them.
Besides, there is another good thing about your best friend being your boss. As least he knows you and you know him. You two like each other and admire each otherwise you can’t become best friends in the first place. It is always good to have a friend in the top management. You may be not on the top of the layoff list when the company goes down. You may get more understanding and support when your family matters conflict with your work. You should also feel lucky after thinking about how often one can end up with a boss who doesn’t see eye to eye on most things with you, a boss who always make it hot for you or a boss who plays favoritism against you.
Of course, after the initial emotional jolt settles down, and you finally accept the fact that your best friend is now your new boss, second question pops up – how am I going to approach him now? It must be awkward, at least a bit. One thing you must be clear headed about is that he is no longer your best friend he was before. Some boundaries must be drawn. Show your respect and show some distance. You two used to hole up in your small cubicle in some idle afternoons, holding down voice carefully, b-i-t-c-h-ing about your boss together excitedly. Can this be done again? NO, NO. You two used to exchange and relish the water cooler gossips during the coffee breaks. Can this be done again? NO, NO. You two used to make those juicy comments at the back about this co-worker’s boobs, that co-worker’s butts. Can this be done again? NO, NO, sorry, no more such fun. To be frank, all those fun stuff above is the magic piece of a great friendship. Without that, you and your newly promoted friend are no longer best friends.
But you can still somehow manage a friendship with him by hanging out after walk with no work talk. What you can do at workplace is to be professional, business is business, don’t make business with pleasure, be open-minded and prepare for the worst. If your new boss gets this promotion thing to his head, start to look down on you or something? He is not a good friend or a respectful boss worth keeping, dust off your resume, dump him and move on.
Can’t blame you for all these groundless speculations and sour grapes. People always compete with each other. This is part of our daily life, part of our nature. The competition is more intense among people you know, most intense among good friends. You two started at the same position in the company and suddenly one has this new title, better pay, a nice office with door, while you are still slaving in the same routine work in the small cubicle and what’s more you have to report to him as a subordinate. Hard not to be grumpy.
But everything has its bright side. It is also a good time to think why your friend gets promoted, not you. Did he work overtime to finish some important projects before deadlines while you were slacking off or busy hitting on the newcomer hottie? Did he come up with some original strategies to help the company hold gains despite the competitive market? Or how did he communicate so successfully with your boss (or in your words – how did he suck up so well?). You can look to him as a positive example you may want to follow for your own career advancement. Learn from him, apply what you’ve learned to your day-to-day work life, and pay your dues and one day you will also be paid off big time. Stuck with a bunch of loser friends, you may never feel this kind of jealousy because you are just one of them.
Besides, there is another good thing about your best friend being your boss. As least he knows you and you know him. You two like each other and admire each otherwise you can’t become best friends in the first place. It is always good to have a friend in the top management. You may be not on the top of the layoff list when the company goes down. You may get more understanding and support when your family matters conflict with your work. You should also feel lucky after thinking about how often one can end up with a boss who doesn’t see eye to eye on most things with you, a boss who always make it hot for you or a boss who plays favoritism against you.
Of course, after the initial emotional jolt settles down, and you finally accept the fact that your best friend is now your new boss, second question pops up – how am I going to approach him now? It must be awkward, at least a bit. One thing you must be clear headed about is that he is no longer your best friend he was before. Some boundaries must be drawn. Show your respect and show some distance. You two used to hole up in your small cubicle in some idle afternoons, holding down voice carefully, b-i-t-c-h-ing about your boss together excitedly. Can this be done again? NO, NO. You two used to exchange and relish the water cooler gossips during the coffee breaks. Can this be done again? NO, NO. You two used to make those juicy comments at the back about this co-worker’s boobs, that co-worker’s butts. Can this be done again? NO, NO, sorry, no more such fun. To be frank, all those fun stuff above is the magic piece of a great friendship. Without that, you and your newly promoted friend are no longer best friends.
But you can still somehow manage a friendship with him by hanging out after walk with no work talk. What you can do at workplace is to be professional, business is business, don’t make business with pleasure, be open-minded and prepare for the worst. If your new boss gets this promotion thing to his head, start to look down on you or something? He is not a good friend or a respectful boss worth keeping, dust off your resume, dump him and move on.
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