APAD: Mend fences

Meaning:

   Re-establish good relations with people one has disagreed with.

 

Background:

 

   `Good fences make good neighbours' is listed by Oxford Dictionary of

   Quotations as a mid 17th century proverb. Robert Frost gave it a boost in the

   American consciousness with his 1914 poem Mending Walls:

 

     ...

     He will not go behind his father's saying,

     And he likes having thought of it so well

     He says again, `Good fences make good neighbors.'

 

   That poem, and the 1870s coining of the term `mending fences' both appear to

   be influenced by the earlier proverb.

 

   In 1879, the American Senator John Sherman returned to his home in Mansfield,

   Ohio and made a speech, in which he said:

 

     "I have come home to look after my fences."

 

   ...

 

- www.phrases.org.uk [edited]

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

My childhood buddy Jianwei and I met for lunch during my visit to my hometown

last Sep. We hadn't seen each other for eight years but I spotted him right away

in traffic. A balding head and a swarthy deep-lined face made him look older

than his age but he was otherwise nimble and healthy. After the initial

jubilation, we sighed over the fleeting of time.

 

``How's your family? How's Jianguo?'' I remembered my friend's older brother,

Jianguo, fondly. Three grades above us, he used to protect us from bullies in

elementary school.

 

``You're getting senile," chuckled Jianwei. ``You forgot we stopped speaking

after our parents passed away.''

 

His parents sided with Jianguo, according to him, in splitting the family wealth

between the two brothers.

 

``I thought it was over. Surely you've mended the fences after so many years!''

 

``Let me ask you something,'' he muttered with a hint of challenge in his voice.

``What's the point of holding a grudge if you don't hold it forever?''

 

I still don't have an answer to that question.

所有跟帖: 

blood thicker than water! don’t understand fighting 4 money -最西边的岛上- 给 最西边的岛上 发送悄悄话 最西边的岛上 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 08:30:18

within family, it’s in the samePot whoever gets them. Sigh… -最西边的岛上- 给 最西边的岛上 发送悄悄话 最西边的岛上 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 08:32:18

It's more common in the villages where people have less -7grizzly- 给 7grizzly 发送悄悄话 7grizzly 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 08:43:27

distractions. -7grizzly- 给 7grizzly 发送悄悄话 7grizzly 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 08:43:39

but still, 能做兄弟姐妹是前世修来的缘分,should 且行且珍惜;-)) -最西边的岛上- 给 最西边的岛上 发送悄悄话 最西边的岛上 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 08:49:13

Nice writeup! It's not rare that brothers become foes:) -暖冬cool夏- 给 暖冬cool夏 发送悄悄话 暖冬cool夏 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 09:48:08

Bcuz of 三观 I can understand, but 4 material things? 不值得,IMHO -最西边的岛上- 给 最西边的岛上 发送悄悄话 最西边的岛上 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 10:00:34

Well, you've been lucky :-) -7grizzly- 给 7grizzly 发送悄悄话 7grizzly 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 10:10:41

Yes, in my&hubby’s families. Gave&Asked 4nothing &got love! -最西边的岛上- 给 最西边的岛上 发送悄悄话 最西边的岛上 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 10:16:34

Thanks. I've sure seen some :-) -7grizzly- 给 7grizzly 发送悄悄话 7grizzly 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 10:07:27

Guess truth is really stranger than fiction:-) -最西边的岛上- 给 最西边的岛上 发送悄悄话 最西边的岛上 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 10:11:49

Maybe, they held onto hatred because, as Baldwin said, "once -7grizzly- 给 7grizzly 发送悄悄话 7grizzly 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 17:09:50

hate is gone, they will be forced to deal with pain." -7grizzly- 给 7grizzly 发送悄悄话 7grizzly 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 17:10:32

Algophobia? Sigh ... -最西边的岛上- 给 最西边的岛上 发送悄悄话 最西边的岛上 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/09/2025 postreply 18:02:59

Nice word. I first thought of algorithm :-) -7grizzly- 给 7grizzly 发送悄悄话 7grizzly 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/10/2025 postreply 07:40:01

programmer @ heart ;-))) -最西边的岛上- 给 最西边的岛上 发送悄悄话 最西边的岛上 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 05/10/2025 postreply 07:58:02

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