【非文青N周一文】我给圣诞老人写的信

Dear Santa,

How are you? How are the reindeers and the elves and Mrs. Claus? I hope you’ve all had a great year.

Santa, from your name, I guess you don’t speak Chinese. So I decide to write this letter in English.

My name is FeiWenQing. You probably don’t know me because, Santa, at the time and the place where I was a child, you didn’t exist. So I have never written to you before. This year, I decided to write to you because I want something for Christmas badly and you are the only person that can give it to me.

Santa, I don’t know if you have been watching me or not. But I have been really good this year. I brush my teeth every night.  I go to potty by myself and I don’t wear diapers any more, even no pull-ups at night! And, I didn’t wet my bed all year， not even for once! I share my toys with my friends. Not the traditional toys, I share stuff with my friends on facebook and other websites.  All my friends like me; At least I think they do.  I have been nice to my sisters and brothers. I haven’t been so nice to my hu*****and though. But he doesn’t count because it’s not on your check list, right? Santa, I haven’t been going to sleep as early as I should, but because I have so much to do at night. Like tonight, I have to stay up to write this letter to you.

Santa, there are many things that I want to ask for. But most of them are not toys. I thought it over very seriously and decided I want a movie in the theatre with my hu*****and as my Christmas present. God! oh, I mean Santa! It’s been so long that I don’t even remember when I last sat in the theatre! It’s probably in 2008 when I was pregnant.  Santa, there are two movies I want to watch: the Descendants and the Tree of Life. If I had to choose between the two, I would have to choose the Descendants as George Clooney has been one of the few white men that have infatuated me. Brad Pitt is pretty good, but I just love George, his glibness, his disgusting handsomeness, his intelligence, even his nose hair on the previous cover of Rolling Stone!

Of course, my hu*****and and I could take turns to go to the theatre, like what my neighbors did. The wife went to see Transformers 3 by herself and came back. Then the hu*****and went to see Transformers 3. Santa, when you and Mrs. Claus see movies, do you take turns?  Probably not. That just sounds sad! Besides, what fun would there be if I have no one sitting next to me watching and taunting me for drooling over George?

We could also pay a nanny to babysit our kids while we go to the theatres. But we don’t trust anyone as much as we trust you. So Santa, could you be a doll and babysit our daughter and son on Christmas Eve when you come to drop their presents?  They are good kids. Oh, you’ve been watching them, you know! My daughter will be so excited to see you. A warning: she will talk your ears off and bomb you with her “why?” questions. Sometimes, however, she does get shy. If that happens, you can just put on an episode of Barney, or Nihao Kailan for her(Santa, do you know how to use Wii to show Netflix? If not, I can set it up before we leave). She will sit through it with no problem.  As for my son, he is a little bit of trouble. But he will be sleeping. If he does wake up (which he does often lately because of teething), he will probably freak out at seeing you as he has stranger anxiety now. You can use the teether I have put in the fridge. Or as I do sometimes, I just let him bite my knuckles. Don’t take it personal when it gets too painful. His biting is only for the sake of his own gum. There is no harm intended. And you are good with kids, right? I believe you can figure out something to ease him back to sleep.

Santa, I will leave you a glass of milk and some cookies (I baked them!)next to our Christmas Tree and there will also be some carrots for Rudolf and the other reindeers.

Good luck with the babysitting! You will enjoy it. After all, you know and this is totally objective: my kids are the most adorable ones in the world!

Love from

FeiWenQing

 

PS:  Santa, what’s your email address? I have your mailing address of the North Pole, but to speed it up a little bit, I would like to have your email address.

所有跟帖： 

• Oh, Santa, please, grant this girl her wish。 -jingbeiboy- ♂ (42 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 11:14:19

• 谢谢京北！ -非文学青年- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 13:02:17

• 文青，你对你LG,你的一双儿女的浓浓的情尽现在这封俏皮的圣诞信中。。好棒！！！ -beautifulwind- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 12:03:47

• 谢谢美风！ -非文学青年- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 13:02:55

• 写得很棒！真是好孩子,这么朴实.不知道你还喜欢GC啊,真是男人不坏,女人不爱。 -cha-cha- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 12:51:25

• 哈哈，GC坏吗？没觉得呀。 -非文学青年- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 13:03:31

• Santa's rindeers will take your couple to the best theater at No -rockcurrent- ♂ (189 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 12:59:57

• 哈哈，thanks, Current! -非文学青年- ♀ (120 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 13:05:01

• Dear Santa, another option for you -肖庄- ♀ (165 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 13:23:10

• Dear Santa, 肖庄小盆友太不厚道了，竟然向你要钱。别给她圣诞礼物了哈。 -非文学青年- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 13:54:27

• DEAR斑竹，你把我的闪奔贴删了吧。空贴害人不好。 -cha-cha- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 14:02:18

• granted. hehe. -非文学青年- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 14:06:33

• haha, 分享一下老公的评语 -非文学青年- ♀ (818 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 14:32:20

• Nice. Compatriot is an SAT word as I remember. -肖庄- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 15:56:58

• 写得真棒！I am sure that Santa will grant little girl's wish. -~叶子~- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 14:38:34

• 谢谢叶子姐姐/妹妹。 ：） -非文学青年- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 14:57:22

• I can be your babysitter! Remeber I told you before I am a gorge -千与.千寻- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 17:36:09

• 后面的被cut了，你打算坐santa的sleigh来当babysitter吗？哈哈 -非文学青年- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 23:03:03

• Dear Santa, this girl is a kidnapper. -EnLearner- ♀ (202 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 19:19:58

• lol，愚公的评论也很幽默！ -非文学青年- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 23:04:03

• Very sweet! I just sent letters to people with power -走马读人- ♂ (184 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 19:58:56

• 哈哈，谢谢老马，很乐！ -非文学青年- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/16/2011 postreply 23:04:38

• May Santa bring you what you expect... -祤湫霖- ♀ (496 bytes) () 12/17/2011 postreply 09:30:08

• 谢谢紫儿，I will check it out. -非文学青年- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/17/2011 postreply 17:55:56