周末一笑: Happy Father’s Day (ZT)

1

Teacher (on phone): You say Michael has a cold and can’t come to school today? To whom am I speaking?
Voice: This is my father.

教师(打电话):你说迈克尔感冒了,今天不能来上学了?我在跟谁说话呢?
配音:这是我父亲。

2

Johnny’s father: Let me see your report card.
Johnny: I don’t have it.
Johnny’s father: Why not?
Johnny: My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents.

约翰尼的父亲:让我看看你的成绩单。
约翰尼:我没有。
约翰尼的父亲:为什么没有呢?
约翰尼:我的朋友刚刚借走。他想吓唬他的父母。

3

“Dad, are bugs good to eat?” asked the boy.
“Let’s not talk about such things at the dinner table, son,” his father replied.
After dinner the father inquired, “Now, son, what did you want to ask me?”
“Oh, nothing,” the boy said.  “There was a bug in your soup, but now it’s gone.”

“爸爸,虫子可以吃吗?”男孩问。
“我们不要在饭桌上谈论这样的事,儿子,”父亲回答说。
晚饭后父亲问,“现在,儿子,你想要问我什么?”
“哦,没什么。”男孩说。 “你的汤中有个虫子,但现在没了。”

4

A small boy was at the zoo with his father.  They were looking at the tigers, and his father was telling him how ferocious they were.
“Daddy, if the tigers got out and ate you up…”
“Yes, son?” the father asked, ready to console him.
“ …Which bus would I take home?”

一个小男孩和他的父亲在动物园。他们在看老虎,他的父亲告诉他,他们有多么凶猛。
“爸爸,如果老虎出来吃了您......”
“是的,儿子?”父亲问,准备安慰他。
“......我乘哪路车回家?”

5

Manny: How do you like the drum set you got for your birthday?
Theo: I love it!
Manny: Why?
Theo: Whenever I don’t play it, my dad gives me 10 bucks!

曼尼:你喜欢你生日得到的架子鼓吗?
西奥:我太喜欢了!
曼尼:为什么?
西奥:每当我不玩了,我爸就给我10块钱!

6

Dear Dad,
$chool i$ great. I’m making lot$ of friend$ and $tudying hard. I $imply can’t think of anything I need, $o ju$t $end me a card, a$ I would love to hear from you.
Love, Your $on

Dear Son,
I kNOw astroNOmy, ecoNOmics and oceaNOgraphy are eNOugh to keep even an hoNOr student busy. Do NOt forget that the pursuit of kNOwledge is a NOble task, and you can never study eNOugh.
Love, Dad

亲爱的爸爸,

学校很棒。我交了很多的朋友并努力学习。我根本想不出我需要什么,所以就给我一张卡吧,我很想听到你的消息。

爱你,你的儿子

 

亲爱的儿子,

我知道天文学,经济学和海洋学足以让一个即使荣誉学生也忙碌。不要忘了,对知识的追求是一个崇高的任务,你永远都学不完。

爱你,爸爸

(Source: http://boyslife.org/)

 

所有跟帖: 

A collection of tough sons:)) I am watching -Flyingstraw- 给 Flyingstraw 发送悄悄话 Flyingstraw 的博客首页 (77 bytes) () 06/17/2016 postreply 19:53:12

I just searched "Fresh off boat", it must be very fun~ Flyingstr -南山松- 给 南山松 发送悄悄话 南山松 的博客首页 (109 bytes) () 06/18/2016 postreply 05:38:14

Good jokes! Shared with my son, we laughed together. -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 06/17/2016 postreply 20:39:10

I'm glad you like them: ) 024, have a nice weekend! -南山松- 给 南山松 发送悄悄话 南山松 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 06/18/2016 postreply 05:39:39

Nice jokes to lighten up Father';s Day. Thanks 松松. Have a nice w -井龙和- 给 井龙和 发送悄悄话 井龙和 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 06/17/2016 postreply 20:58:44

Thanks 井龙和, Happy Father's Day!~ -南山松- 给 南山松 发送悄悄话 南山松 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 06/18/2016 postreply 05:40:20

father is farther, mother is near, pine is tall, grass is shorte -走马读人- 给 走马读人 发送悄悄话 走马读人 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 06/18/2016 postreply 07:01:37

Haha, thanks 走马读人, Happy Father's Day! -南山松- 给 南山松 发送悄悄话 南山松 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 06/18/2016 postreply 09:09:42

Haha, "this is my father"! -肖庄- 给 肖庄 发送悄悄话 肖庄 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 06/18/2016 postreply 23:49:45

Haha, he is not a good liar~ 肖庄, have a nice weekend! -南山松- 给 南山松 发送悄悄话 南山松 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 06/19/2016 postreply 04:55:43

谢谢松松的父亲节笑话,迟到的祝福送给所有的父亲,节日快乐。 -斯葭- 给 斯葭 发送悄悄话 斯葭 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 06/28/2016 postreply 19:06:18

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