But when they live in our place, they don't think we provide all those convenience. And when we asked them to stay in 老人公寓, they don't want to. I had same situation as you, my 2 kids were either in school or daycare and we drop/pick up them ourself. Good things is my inlaws were still willing to cook dinner for us. But nobody really want to eat their cooking includes 2 kids. Now we finally ask them to go back to China. They can come to visit us, but not staying here for years. I perfer to do things myself and I need my own space.