I feel sorry for you

It happened to me too during my divorce. it is hard to cope.

try to talk to a close friend, who are willing to listen and help,

try to talk to your family doctor and get a referral to psychiatrist, sometimes, a short term magic pill can help.

but most important. you have to be strong, if the marriage is going to end, and you cannot take it back, let it go. get the support part for you and your children. your children need you. after you go through this and back into social circle, you will find there are other men who are much better than your ex.

Enjoy your own life, do not let others live your life.