Good job

Your work is so inspirational to me. I've been playing with the idea of writing a novel about the 1989 Tiananmen prodemocracy movement for years. what you said in the introduction echoes with me. Thank you for sharing. 

My comment:

Your English is very good, but I have the feeling that your writing is somewhat textbookish, meaning not quite natural. ALso, your writing style needs a bit of refinement as some parts do not read smoothly. You seemed to have skipped from one idea to another without making the necessary connection, leaving your reader to wonder "what do you really what to say?"

My two cents. 

所有跟帖： 

• 学习了 -妖妖灵- ♀ (0 bytes) () 02/01/2023 postreply 20:46:12

• Thanks for the suggestion! -writeforfun- ♂ (42 bytes) () 02/02/2023 postreply 06:58:40

• Question -kawanonagare- ♂ (233 bytes) () 02/02/2023 postreply 07:34:51

• I used Snagit by TechSmith to catch -writeforfun- ♂ (97 bytes) () 02/02/2023 postreply 07:49:21

• 下次你自己读自己录出来！会更有感情！：） -妖妖灵- ♀ (0 bytes) () 02/02/2023 postreply 08:32:32

• 谢谢鼓励！但我语音一出口可能就会驱走一些网友 :-) -writeforfun- ♂ (0 bytes) () 02/02/2023 postreply 10:08:24

• Thank you -kawanonagare- ♂ (781 bytes) () 02/02/2023 postreply 09:33:02

• Thanks so much for the changes you made. Will follow your -writeforfun- ♂ (55 bytes) () 02/02/2023 postreply 10:09:59