不是坑呀不是坑

来源: 还是穿马甲 于 2007-11-26 18:46:22 [] [旧帖] [给我悄悄话] 阅读数 : (4414 bytes)

I am really confused and want to talk to girls.
Here is my real story.
几年之前我和老公都在美国读书, 后来老公毕业后在香港找到了不错的工作, 我们就全家一起搬回了香港. 香港的生活很忙碌, 时间过的也很快. 来港一年后我们有了第二个孩子, 在我做月子的时候, 发生了很多事. 老公出差去大陆回来, 我帮他收拾包, 发现了避孕套, 当时觉得天都要塌下来了, 虽然他是他什么都没做, 只是因为我怀孕期间耐不住寂寞而已, 有这个想法, 我在大吵大闹之后也相信了他, 其实心里已经原谅他了. 有了两个可爱的孩子, 日子还是要过下去的. 但其实有些创伤是永远也不能愈合的. 我开始觉得不安全, 于是开始疯狂找工作, 凭着美国的学历, 很快就搞定了工作, 我有了自己的收入, 也有了自己的生活圈子, 这件事随着时间的推移, 也就淡了. 日子忙碌的过着, 孩子一天天长大. 有双方父母和佣人的帮忙, 我们到也还算轻松. 可是最近, 也就是最近半年吧, 我们之间好像越来越远了, 夫妻生活平淡无味, 好像他根本对我没兴趣, 当成完成任务一样, 平时两个人喜欢做的事也不同, 谁也不愿意迁就谁, 各自玩各自的, 就算是聊天也没有什么话可说. 工作, 回家, 吃饭睡觉, 和小孩玩一下. 自己有活动随时可以去, 只要时间不冲突就行 ( 我们至少有一个人在家陪小孩).
结婚以后我一直是不错的妈妈和妻子, 至少我自己这么认为. 但也许因为最近我们之间的问题, 我的心开始有点野, 很想出去疯狂一下, 比如说去disco, bars, just drink and dance. 结婚以后我就从来没有在去过这些地方, 因为我老公不喜欢, 他会很无聊. 于是, 在某一个星期五, 我去了一间本地很有名的bar, 我还花了点时间找地方, 因为从来没去过. 我去的有点早, 人不多, 在这种地方, 很快就会有人hit on 单身的漂亮女人 (我看起来比较年轻, 身材也不错). 一个样子还不错的白人请我跳舞, OK then, I am alone anyway. 后来他跟我聊天, 他说他是 US Marine, 这时我才突然意识到好像新闻有说一艘美舰经停香港, 而且他们一班人都好短的头发, 还有USMC 的tattoo. He was really funny and cute, of cause muscular, and a good dancer too. He said he liked me very much, I thought he just wanted to get laid. But to be honest, I felt very happy the whole night. God, It was the greatest night for last eight years, well, since I got married. We were dancing and chatting about my life in the States and his life in army and his family ( he is single and 21 years old, half white and half Hispanic, I am sure about these), and later he kept touching me and kissing my face (not on lips cause I refused to), and I really enjoyed it (shame on me). He was a little bit nervous when he knew I had a master’s degree from the States and he didn’t even go to college. After midnight, his friends had to go back to their ship before 1am, and he asked to go to my place with me, I said no of cause, then he asked for my number. I started to feel panic, I told him I was married, please don’t call me. He was surprised cause he thought I was single ( I didn’t wear a ring) and he asked me if I was not happy with my marriage, I had to admit that he was right. He didn’t not force me to do anything then I grab a taxi and went home. But for the whole night and the following day, I could’t concentrate and kept thinking about him, though I couldn’t even remember his name. Then the following night, I went to that bar again, I didn’t expect to find him there, but he was there ( same bar , same time, same person). He saw me after I sat down alone, and he came over to say hello. We talked and danced again, I felt a little bit sad because that night was the last night they stay here. I really liked him. Then the best part, we went to a hotel, it was my idea. ……………
We were in a rush and we didn’t have a second chance to talk again. After he left and their ship headed back to Japan, I feel really guilty , empty and abandoned , and I even want to do a HIV test, just for a while.
Now, after a few weeks, I still miss him very much, and I still don’t know his name. I am not a bad girl and he is the only one I have been with except my hu*****and, and I told him this, he said he would remember me, I hope he would. This is something crazy I did. And it is a real story. I will enjoy the feeling deeply in my heart for my whole life, and maybe some day, we meet again …….I will ask “what ‘s your name …..? “.
Now we are even, I mean me and my hubby. I feel much better, and I guess I am still a good wife and mother. Yesterday, I went to the same bar, thinking about him, dancing alone, I miss him so much, hope he will look at my picture sometimes and remember that pretty Chinese girl…..(too bad he has my pic and I don’t have one)
Am I stupid? Do I love him? I am not sure.


所有跟帖： 

• it is because u have no passion in ur marriage? -fanfan88- ♀ 给 fanfan88 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 18:54:41

• 也许我应该离开现在的生活,但我不能原谅自己不负责任, 对先生和孩子 -还是穿马甲- ♀ 给 还是穿马甲 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 18:59:30

• hey it is not because you自己不负责任, 对先生和孩子. -fanfan88- ♀ 给 fanfan88 发送悄悄话 (421 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:14:46

• 不能因为生活一平淡就出去找激情吧？那，那，世界就太乱了 -天涯何处无芳草- ♀ 给 天涯何处无芳草 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 06:56:54

• 回复：不是坑呀不是坑 -tuzhirong- ♀ 给 tuzhirong 发送悄悄话 (211 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 18:57:37

• 我想我们都想挽回, but how??? -还是穿马甲- ♀ 给 还是穿马甲 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:06:01

• 哎 -阿呆瓜- ♀ 给 阿呆瓜 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:04:00

• 回复：不是坑呀不是坑 -thepowerofgoodbye- ♀ 给 thepowerofgoodbye 发送悄悄话 (184 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:08:02

• 我看事情比较现实,高中毕业的军人没啥前途,忘了他吧,真在一起 -lancomelover- ♀ 给 lancomelover 发送悄悄话 (95 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:08:05

• Thanks, you are right, I guess I just miss that feeling, not tha -还是穿马甲- ♀ 给 还是穿马甲 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:10:54

• 你不会想美国大兵到这种程度吧？还真想在一起？ -天涯何处无芳草- ♀ 给 天涯何处无芳草 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 07:00:23

• 他怎么会和一个大自己那么多还离过婚带着两个孩子的女人在一起 -天涯何处无芳草- ♀ 给 天涯何处无芳草 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 07:01:18

• 回复：it's the feeling -JJMMNJ- ♀ 给 JJMMNJ 发送悄悄话 (155 bytes) () 11/29/2007 postreply 11:27:18

• ONS，忘了吧。最好还是做个HIV test。你并不爱那个海军，刺激而已。 -伍迪艾伦- ♀ 给 伍迪艾伦 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:12:51

• Just try to forget about the ons guy. -jhnn- ♀ 给 jhnn 发送悄悄话 jhnn 的博客首页 (301 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:13:26

• 你疯了？ONS连保护措施都没有？他应该是Navy 不是Marine -microbear- ♀ 给 microbear 发送悄悄话 (102 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:16:16

• I did have protection, but I still worried about HIV -还是穿马甲- ♀ 给 还是穿马甲 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:18:22

• 有保护就好，应该没事。还是把他忘了吧，他到日本会有更 -microbear- ♀ 给 microbear 发送悄悄话 (117 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:24:45

• YES,SHOULD BE NAVY,AND VERY DANGEROUS FOR HEALTH -maysuh- ♀ 给 maysuh 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 20:01:26

• Nothin is wrong if he is Marine. Some Marines are on Navy ship. -piapia- ♀ 给 piapia 发送悄悄话 piapia 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 21:12:06

• you are right. -还是穿马甲- ♀ 给 还是穿马甲 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 22:30:26

• 那个人，真的还是忘了。婚姻是一场持久的战争，说它 -闪亮的瞬间- ♀ 给 闪亮的瞬间 发送悄悄话 (482 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:18:03

• 说的太对了。生活就是平淡的，激情只是一瞬间，不可能永恒，否则要， -糯米圆子- ♀ 给 糯米圆子 发送悄悄话 糯米圆子 的博客首页 (88 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:43:40

• 估计是在兰桂坊巴 -maltese123- ♀ 给 maltese123 发送悄悄话 (28 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:37:40

• 那个人估计都不知道你是哪个了， 这事谁当真谁吃亏，忘了吧 -从加拿大来- ♀ 给 从加拿大来 发送悄悄话 从加拿大来 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 19:52:57

• hey i understand u completely -katz- ♀ 给 katz 发送悄悄话 (706 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 20:08:58

• Thank you, I think you really understand me -还是穿马甲- ♀ 给 还是穿马甲 发送悄悄话 (429 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 22:27:51

• 很有意思的故事 -坑蒙拐骗- ♂ 给 坑蒙拐骗 发送悄悄话 (605 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 20:12:47

• i hv many GI friends, married or single but all -princessgr- ♀ 给 princessgr 发送悄悄话 (247 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 20:23:36

• 大兵的ons还是别当真吧有个朋友也是美国大兵在日本驻了3年 -我爱可乐- ♀ 给 我爱可乐 发送悄悄话 我爱可乐 的博客首页 (78 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 20:26:36

• 问题不在于他是谁,以后或以前的生活如何,问题是我的生活,以后会如何 -还是穿马甲- ♀ 给 还是穿马甲 发送悄悄话 (225 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 20:36:45

• 回复：问题不在于他是谁,以后或以前的生活如何,问题是我的生活,以后会如何 -katz- ♀ 给 katz 发送悄悄话 (335 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 20:42:46

• i like what u said. totally agree -soldanella- ♀ 给 soldanella 发送悄悄话 soldanella 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 01:44:03

• 经历了激情, 再回落于平淡的生活不是件容易的事情, -thepowerofgoodbye- ♀ 给 thepowerofgoodbye 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 21:04:53

• no worries, there arn't nobody you can't forget -katz- ♀ 给 katz 发送悄悄话 (14 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 21:06:48

• 回复：经历了激情, 再回落于平淡的生活不是件容易的事情, -thepowerofgoodbye- ♀ 给 thepowerofgoodbye 发送悄悄话 (137 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 21:08:07

• 回复：I totally understand what you meant... -JJMMNJ- ♀ 给 JJMMNJ 发送悄悄话 (586 bytes) () 11/29/2007 postreply 11:05:57

• 回复：不是坑呀不是坑 -salama6898- ♀ 给 salama6898 发送悄悄话 (89 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 21:02:56

• Now I know I am not alone. -还是穿马甲- ♀ 给 还是穿马甲 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 22:16:45

• 嗯，在平淡乏味白开水一样的日子当中能重新有这么一次 -大开眼界呀- ♀ 给 大开眼界呀 发送悄悄话 大开眼界呀 的博客首页 (251 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 21:07:15

• 我也不敢相信这样的事会发生在我身上.至少人生有多了一次经历 -还是穿马甲- ♀ 给 还是穿马甲 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 22:18:25

• 回复：I don't think you would be able to forget -JJMMNJ- ♀ 给 JJMMNJ 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/29/2007 postreply 11:08:17

• Answer is Yes, No. -puffer- ♀ 给 puffer 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/26/2007 postreply 22:07:20

• 这样的事情太普遍了，平淡的生活太久，想找个刺激 -miren- ♀ 给 miren 发送悄悄话 (109 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 05:48:33

• 解决婚姻的问题不该尝试这个极端的办法 -夏雨不愁- ♀ 给 夏雨不愁 发送悄悄话 夏雨不愁 的博客首页 (172 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 06:04:07

• 回复：我到不觉得当事人是有企图的尝试...... -JJMMNJ- ♀ 给 JJMMNJ 发送悄悄话 (406 bytes) () 11/29/2007 postreply 10:28:06

• 说说我的观点，中国人的缺陷，婚前没有玩过，婚后 -天涯何处无芳草- ♀ 给 天涯何处无芳草 发送悄悄话 (1104 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 06:27:47

• speechless...... -舞桐- ♀ 给 舞桐 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 09:44:52

• Just a ONS and you enjoyed. Not a big deal. -youwillremember- ♀ 给 youwillremember 发送悄悄话 (311 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 08:03:46

• 可以理解你做的；要么收手免受伤，要么再多玩点免疫你就不会这么天真了 -*嫩寒锁梦*- ♀ 给 *嫩寒锁梦* 发送悄悄话 *嫩寒锁梦* 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 09:01:54

• 这件事忘了算了，关键是将来 -舞桐- ♀ 给 舞桐 发送悄悄话 (318 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 09:50:39

• 谁给科普一下，navy和Marine的区别 -cocoyiyaya- ♀ 给 cocoyiyaya 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 10:12:36

• navy is HaiJun, marine is HaiJunLuZhanDui. -puffer- ♀ 给 puffer 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 14:12:41

• the marine is more combat ready. -*嫩寒锁梦*- ♀ 给 *嫩寒锁梦* 发送悄悄话 *嫩寒锁梦* 的博客首页 (243 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 14:28:45

• 像你心理这么强的，以后还会有的。只要有机会 -pastispast- ♂ 给 pastispast 发送悄悄话 (82 bytes) () 11/27/2007 postreply 12:45:34

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