How can I reject unwanted HELP?

来源: placidworld 2019-06-19 17:07:37 [] [旧帖] [给我悄悄话] 本文已被阅读: 次 (2373 bytes)

Last two weeks, my company has gone through many layoffs which caused only 2 people left in my team - my boss and I. Worst part is, my boss has schedueled 4 weeks vacation before the layoff. Now I am the only person who is working on all the projects. Someone from west coast was brought in to help me go through this difficult time. Yes, he is trying to help - not helping with the parts I need the most, he kept requesting me to send him my coding which I did mulitple times (he never read emails) even converted some code he was not able to read (he does not know the language) into plain text. 

Then he totally ignored my real need for help, kept asking me to explain why we need do business certain way, questioning business owners why they made the strategy the way it is and the validity, questioning my efficiency with mulitple coding languages which he obviously does not understand. 

He kept telling me to stop doing what we've been doing.

I had enough of this kind of help and had to talk to the project manager who is managing all the projetcs for us. I shared my frustration and expressed the concern of the high risk his behavior brought in to our projects. 

He got extremely mad and not just hung me up in the meeting when I told him what's our priorities are, also he emailed the whole group that IT IS A NEED to go over thousands lines of my coding now. 

We tried to tell him under current scenario, changing process or revisit the programs which have been proved successful is not the top priority, we need get all projects on plate delivered on time with good quality then go back to see what we can do to improve later when we have time. 

He refused to listen. What should I do? I will ignore him but it did not work. I wrote emails about what priorities we have and what needs to be done, he ignored. During daily meetings, we talked about priorities, he ignored. I appreciate all his good intention, but really need him to leave me alone so I can complete what needs to be done. 

How can I make him stop? Should I talk to higher up? His behavior is jeopardizing my productivity and put projects on high risk.  Sorry my Chinese version does not work.

所有跟帖: 

My approach - will tell him directly and firmly that I appreciat -placidworld- 给 placidworld 发送悄悄话 (534 bytes) () 06/19/2019 postreply 17:27:43

不知为什么说NO怎么如此困难。礼貌再轻松地带着微笑类似歉意似的说出真实的理由,难吗?自己在那里纠结任情绪压抑,别人会觉得很奇怪。 -世上事本无- 给 世上事本无 发送悄悄话 (328 bytes) () 06/19/2019 postreply 19:34:13

I am Bao Zi, and too nice to say NO. But I am learning. Thanks -placidworld- 给 placidworld 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 06/20/2019 postreply 13:25:31

人从西部给派来,不是来help你的,是来lead的,你还是得弄明白他给派来的目的 -Anjiff- 给 Anjiff 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 06/22/2019 postreply 08:03:21

在公司重组时休四周的假,你肯定你老板不是找工作去了?如果你老板不是和上面有关系,他是下一个走的人,你有没有可能取代他? -废话多多- 给 废话多多 发送悄悄话 废话多多 的博客首页 (1257 bytes) () 06/20/2019 postreply 02:01:54

Every single time read your post, I love it. Right on spot. -placidworld- 给 placidworld 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 06/20/2019 postreply 13:26:17

我觉得你是想多了,特别是在大裁员的环境下 -天寺- 给 天寺 发送悄悄话 天寺 的博客首页 (562 bytes) () 06/20/2019 postreply 07:23:12

Took your advice. And working with PM. -placidworld- 给 placidworld 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 06/20/2019 postreply 13:26:51

他不听,你就不理。就这么简单。等你老板回来再说。你不如省出时间来另找工作有备无患 -Timshel- 给 Timshel 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 06/20/2019 postreply 09:14:24

Have to be ready for any changes - resume ready. -placidworld- 给 placidworld 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 06/20/2019 postreply 13:27:57

感觉西部要take over 你们 -julie116- 给 julie116 发送悄悄话 julie116 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 06/20/2019 postreply 10:46:41

Always being this way - Risk team was taken over, Technology was -placidworld- 给 placidworld 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 06/20/2019 postreply 13:27:31

西部这种人员冗余:) -julie116- 给 julie116 发送悄悄话 julie116 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 06/20/2019 postreply 14:18:50

Why did you think he was trying to help you? -One1618- 给 One1618 发送悄悄话 (568 bytes) () 06/20/2019 postreply 11:28:59

You are right. Can be both. Thanks. -placidworld- 给 placidworld 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 06/20/2019 postreply 13:25:03

Updates: He backed off. -placidworld- 给 placidworld 发送悄悄话 (616 bytes) () 06/20/2019 postreply 13:33:16

New update 1: what happened today -placidworld- 给 placidworld 发送悄悄话 (1510 bytes) () 06/21/2019 postreply 12:59:15

重复一次废过的话:他不会停止现在的作为,你也改不了他的为人处事。说句招人不待见的话: -废话多多- 给 废话多多 发送悄悄话 废话多多 的博客首页 (1904 bytes) () 06/22/2019 postreply 03:18:39

我感觉是他是被派来指导和监督你的,不管你愿不愿意。弄清楚你和他的工作关系后再下结论。如果你是被领导的,即使再不合理也有你的错。 -世上事本无- 给 世上事本无 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 06/21/2019 postreply 13:54:52

He is trying to lead while my boss is on long vacation. This is -placidworld- 给 placidworld 发送悄悄话 (202 bytes) () 06/21/2019 postreply 14:01:10

如果老板走之前,没有对你交代过你是他走后的联系人(email上的auto reply),那就建议你要服从领导,有的任命不都是官方 -世上事本无- 给 世上事本无 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 06/21/2019 postreply 14:55:55

Actually I am assigned for all our product related projects due -placidworld- 给 placidworld 发送悄悄话 (248 bytes) () 06/21/2019 postreply 17:03:38

唉,第一个跟贴白说了,重复一次废过的话:有人来问题,能回答就回答,不想回答的,让他等你的头儿回来问你的头儿。 -废话多多- 给 废话多多 发送悄悄话 废话多多 的博客首页 (1517 bytes) () 06/22/2019 postreply 03:17:01

When he raised his voice, -One1618- 给 One1618 发送悄悄话 (1057 bytes) () 06/21/2019 postreply 15:42:02

Thank you. Great advice. -placidworld- 给 placidworld 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 06/21/2019 postreply 16:59:50

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