To why-why & those who don't believe in picking & choosing

Picking and choosing don't conflict with falling in love.

Personally, I fell in love for the 1st time when I was 16. We dated for 6 years. Then I chose to leave that relationship behind me. It was painful. I couldn't date anyone for more than 2 years. But I went through it.
Many years later, I fell in love with my hu*****and. But I also "chose" him. I had other choices. He chose me, too. He held out and didn't marry somebody just for the sake of getting married.
I have had a bad boyfriend to whom I was extremely attracted. I am so glad that I finally chose to leave him.
I have also had a very good one. But I was young and stupid. I had no idea how good he was to me until too late. I didn't know how to appreciate people. That was a bad choice and the only choice that I have ever regretted.

As you can see, I fell in love. But I also picked and chose. I made good decisions. And bad ones, too!

It is perfectly O.K. to fall in love. It is perfectly O.K. to fall in love at the 1st sight. It is even perfectly O.K. to fall in love with a wrong person, or a bad guy, at the 1st sight. Go ahead and fall in love with whoever bumps into you. But after all the love and pain, you still have the right to say "no" if that person isn't right for you. You have choices to make. So why not take charge? Do not rely on "碰" for your marriage.

所有跟帖： 

• 顶一下，爱情和婚姻是不是一回事，不能搞混了 -britannica- ♀ (44 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:32:23

• Thank you. -MMXIAO- ♀ (26 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:34:41

• 眼力和幸运都存在 -study- ♀ (126 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:36:14

• 俺有时候觉得包办婚姻也挺好，没有盲目性 -云槎- ♀ (112 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:39:14

• 另外几乎没有离婚的可能行，认命比较容易:) -britannica- ♀ (80 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:41:31

• 每个人滴幸福标准不一样.俺滴就特低，所以就容易满足 -老妈也恋网- ♀ (65 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:44:42

• 顶。幸福和心态太有关系了。 -4月芳菲- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:46:22

• MM好！ -老妈也恋网- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:50:33

• 老妈靓妹好！ -4月芳菲- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:52:50

• 老妈，太喜欢你那张捧着雪的PP了。象童话世界！ -4月芳菲- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:06:08

• 呵呵。。。嫩吧？ -老妈也恋网- ♀ (15 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:10:29

• 本来就嫩。你的ID太misleading了，应该是嫩妈网恋才对啊：） -4月芳菲- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:16:56

• 老妈呀，这话俺也想说来着。 -sw2- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:18:45

• 你也看见啦？难道就我没看见？ -sw2- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:16:25

• 还有歌圣SG。要老妈给你开小灶吧。老妈很大方的。 -4月芳菲- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:19:49

• 咋有关系拉？俺要是幸福，就说明俺心态好？那要不幸福呢？ -sw2- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:51:13

• 美人，你这心态，要不幸福都难。 -4月芳菲- ♀ (58 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:55:34

• 美人呀，你现在夸人的本领绝对见长，跟我学的？俺同意你。 -sw2- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:59:21

• 你们在说什么？ -study- ♀ (79 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:02:48

• 因为他们自己自以为见了世面，就嫌弃糟糠，所以才不幸福，嘿嘿 -云槎- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:18:05

• 那他们都和原配过一辈子才会幸福？ -study- ♀ (82 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:22:45

• 包办婚姻的对等立场是站在最初的对等基础上的 -云槎- ♀ (288 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:41:14

• 还有，古代的父母对孩子的了解不如现代的父母 -云槎- ♀ (324 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:49:17

• 代沟什么时候都存在 -study- ♀ (190 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 13:54:09

• 非常同意！ 我见过的包办婚姻都很幸福。开头期望值低，结婚后是往上走 -毕小珠- ♀ (38 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 10:29:53

• True. We can only try our best. -MMXIAO- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:40:54

• 是的。人是会因时间和环境而变的。一时难看定一世。 -4月芳菲- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:48:37

• 看滴老妈这个晕噢~~~ -老妈也恋网- ♀ (62 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:36:50

• 恋网妈! I love you photos! -MMXIAO- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:39:18

• thank you! -老妈也恋网- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:39:49

• 有人的伴侣不是选的吗？我想都是吧 -vdgella- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:45:23

• Some "碰", like a friend of mine -MMXIAO- ♀ (377 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:03:23

• 说一句说了等于没说的话，成功的婚姻的因素太多了，缺一不可。 -sw2- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:57:15

• agree! -老妈也恋网- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 08:58:01

• 老妈呀，俺今天一进流坛，铺天盖地的全是你的fan啊，可俺咋啥也没看见呢？你删了？ -sw2- ♀ (77 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:04:38

• 嗯，俺删料 -老妈也恋网- ♀ (16 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:11:32

• 俺没看见呀，俺今天才上班。不过俺能想象到老妈的风采。 -sw2- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 09:14:21

• 你16岁起就开始谈恋爱，这点很重要。26岁才开始的人就没你那么多选择 -听听意见- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 10:11:57

• disagree:) Many of my friends didn't get married until -MMXIAO- ♀ (137 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 10:46:38

• How do you pick after you have a child? Appreciate if you want t -问题1- ♀ (368 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 10:18:18

• 有很多勇敢的单身妈妈，这里就有，只是这种故事不好share -毕小珠- ♀ (86 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 10:25:19

• Where is the blog? Could you give a hint? -问题1- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 10:51:50

• 左边推荐伯克里有 -毕小珠- ♀ (50 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 11:17:26

• I would say here in the U.S. it is a lot easier -MMXIAO- ♀ (217 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 10:41:37

• 回复：I would say here in the U.S. it is a lot easier -问题1- ♀ (224 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 10:57:22

• I said "easier". Not "easy". A big difference here. -MMXIAO- ♀ (314 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 11:56:31

• 同意。比昨天说的全面多了：）光有爱是不行的，没有爱也是不行的 -毕小珠- ♀ (66 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 10:22:15

• haha...all right, let's keep going... -why-why- ♀ (1364 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 10:57:47

• 你的意思是不是大家都鼓励孩子16岁去谈恋爱，不然就成不lucky了 -britannica- ♀ (112 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 12:00:36

• Exactly! -MMXIAO- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 12:06:37

• bingo...my point exactly... -why-why- ♀ (960 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 12:15:33

• why-why -MMXIAO- ♀ (146 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 12:49:52

• hehe...you answered my post...remember? -why-why- ♀ (722 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 13:15:49

• Just to keep the records straight -MMXIAO- ♀ (981 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 12:41:41

• anyway... -why-why- ♀ (1276 bytes) () 12/28/2007 postreply 13:05:22