My personal experience-sending kids home

I want to say something from my personal experience:

I was sent to live with my grandparents from 5-12 years old. My parents had two kids and worked full time. They had to commute one and half hours each way to go to home. So they chose to send one kid away and keep another. My mom brought me back every Saturday and sent me off every Monday.

I left home for college at 17 and came to US at 21. I graduated from an IVY school and am teaching at a major state university. I made 160K per year.

But I had to say that I felt deeply scarred by the experience.

I always remembered that every Saturday afternoon, I would wait for at least one hour for my mom at bus station.Every drop-off time, my dad would go to a store to buy cookie for me to bribe me to go.When I was older, I would take 5:00am bus in the dark every Monday morning so I could stay one more night at my own home (My parents' home is 2 hrs from my grandparents'home).

I was a well-behaved kid for my whole life because I felt like a guest both in my home and my grandparents'home.My grandparents were well educated and treated me very nicely.But I feel that grandparents are not as sensitive as a mom. I am very nice to my parents but I am never close to my .I have never had a deep friendly and open talk with my grandparents. I have never told my grandparents any of my thoughts.

This experience affects my personality deeply. I never feel safe. I have to work very hard because I do not trust other people. In my whole life, I have never asked anything from my parents because I don't have the guts. I have to work very hard to prove myself and to make my parents proud. If I have some nice things, I will always give them to my parents first.

I really envy other kids who feel so at easy with their parents.In my heart, I just want to be a kid in front of my parents. But now, I am just a so-called successful daughter. My parents attribute my so-called success to my grandparent's education, which is absolutely true. I would rather to be a kid who stays with them.

所有跟帖： 

• 快抱抱! -MMXIAO- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:15:13

• I have to say you are lucky very much. I lived with my grandma 1 -Bin123- ♂ (373 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:46:31

• I lived with my grandma 1 to 5 old in shanghai without parents -Bin123- ♂ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:48:17

• I think long time away from parents is bad. One or two months -skiiiiiii- ♀ (36 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:03:56

• I bless my mom because I learn taking care myselve dearly -Bin123- ♂ (162 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:11:04

• I don't blame them. I just try to assess the impact of -skiiiiiii- ♀ (34 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:13:56

• remember my dear MM, no pain no gain, that is all we here unders -Bin123- ♂ (68 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:17:26

• Thank you for the sharing. Blessing. -冒一冒泡- ♂ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:20:12

• 抱抱 -dalla- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:21:37

• ＨＵＧ！ -毕小珠-- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:21:55

• 聽著很心酸。 -amommy- ♀ (57 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:23:23

• No one. That is why I had some issues now. -skiiiiiii- ♀ (134 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:25:54

• you need mental consel -CChumom- ♀ (53 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:32:17

• I mean counsel. -CChumom- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:32:38

• you did say how you come to US, you alone or with your parents -Bin123- ♂ (153 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:06:45

• By myself on full scholarship. -skiiiiiii- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:09:42

• My parents also sent me to a boarding daycare from 3-5 yrs. -skiiiiiii- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:11:15

• I would like to take off cap to you. you are good,strong girl -Bin123- ♂ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:15:07

• I hate to say "I told you", but I told you :) -cchumom- ♀ (95 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:18:06

• Haha, niu -Bin123- ♂ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:24:31

• you definitly inherite your Chinese parents'character,BSO -bin123- ♂ (172 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:24:44

• I am accounting faculty at a major state university. It is -skiiiiiii- ♀ (17 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:26:58

• ignore those jealous people -CChumom- ♀ (174 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:28:21

• most important is revealing your income wouldn't make -Bin123- ♂ (75 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:58:50

• But somebody tell people their kids go to Ivy to prove they are -ShengQi- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:32:32

• right to leave their kids. -ShengQi- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:33:53

• Common on Bin! -ctimeagain- ♀ (290 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:35:38

• that is why I say "never understand it religiously -Bin123- ♂ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:31:26

• Yes, in our college, faculties in business school make a lot of -ShengQi- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:32:20

• money -ShengQi- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:39:47

• Hug! -ShengQi- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:25:06

• hug hug, 你跟我LG一样。平时我连提都不敢提他的过去。 -野人花园- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:27:39

• 回复：My personal experience-sending kids home -emom- ♀ (268 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:32:31

• hug hug ~~~ -胡桃架子-- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:34:15

• I am not trying to BSO. I just want to say that -skiiiiiii- ♀ (149 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:34:29

• 真可怜！我儿子每次回中国，在亲戚家里都特乖， -cat69- ♀ (136 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:34:31

• Absolutely. You son knows that you will love him unconditionally -skiiiiiii- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:36:42

• Hug -诃诃- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:40:25

• 就是这样，只有经历过的才知道其中的痛，抱抱 -94760- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:44:24

• 写的非常好，很深。我很老了才意识到这些。大半辈子都觉得不安全。 -hobo-hobo- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:48:19

• 嗯。我也有类似的经历 -LilyWhite- ♀ (198 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:55:35

• I feel that my parents also try to compensate -skiiiiiii- ♀ (68 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 11:58:03

• 回复：My personal experience-sending kids home -nutrition2- ♀ (150 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:04:32

• HUG -杨-柳- ♀ (57 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:06:20

• The past lead to where you are now… -soccerfan- ♀ (375 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:16:37

• true, but心灵的伤害也会跟一倍子，不是钱可以弥补的 -everafter- ♀ (36 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:35:37

• 7年太长了，看的很心疼都快哭了。俺到了初中还抱着俺娘睡觉呢。 -everafter- ♀ (88 bytes) () 07/14/2009 postreply 12:33:19

• 回复：My personal experience-sending kids home -forte815- ♀ (187 bytes) () 07/15/2009 postreply 21:34:58

• Go home during summer vacation -forte815- ♀ (47 bytes) () 07/15/2009 postreply 21:41:15

• 回复：My personal experience-sending kids home -forte815- ♀ (0 bytes) () 07/18/2009 postreply 17:46:13