My personal experience-sending kids home

I want to say something from my personal experience:

I was sent to live with my grandparents from 5-12 years old. My parents had two kids and worked full time. They had to commute one and half hours each way to go to home. So they chose to send one kid away and keep another. My mom brought me back every Saturday and sent me off every Monday.

I left home for college at 17 and came to US at 21. I graduated from an IVY school and am teaching at a major state university. I made 160K per year.

But I had to say that I felt deeply scarred by the experience.

I always remembered that every Saturday afternoon, I would wait for at least one hour for my mom at bus station.Every drop-off time, my dad would go to a store to buy cookie for me to bribe me to go.When I was older, I would take 5:00am bus in the dark every Monday morning so I could stay one more night at my own home (My parents' home is 2 hrs from my grandparents'home).

I was a well-behaved kid for my whole life because I felt like a guest both in my home and my grandparents'home.My grandparents were well educated and treated me very nicely.But I feel that grandparents are not as sensitive as a mom. I am very nice to my parents but I am never close to my .I have never had a deep friendly and open talk with my grandparents. I have never told my grandparents any of my thoughts.

This experience affects my personality deeply. I never feel safe. I have to work very hard because I do not trust other people. In my whole life, I have never asked anything from my parents because I don't have the guts. I have to work very hard to prove myself and to make my parents proud. If I have some nice things, I will always give them to my parents first.

I really envy other kids who feel so at easy with their parents.In my heart, I just want to be a kid in front of my parents. But now, I am just a so-called successful daughter. My parents attribute my so-called success to my grandparent's education, which is absolutely true. I would rather to be a kid who stays with them.