"特别这几天他们俩就商量着改我完成的一部分code,改了就相互review,当我空气"

来源: One1618 2019-10-11 19:27:09 [] [旧帖] [给我悄悄话] 本文已被阅读: 次 (1661 bytes)
回答: 和同事吵架了悄悄话2019-10-11 11:40:40

 

You should feel happy about it.  It shows what you do really attracts attention, and everyone wants to take part in it.

Someone said/did something, and you feel angry.  Looks like two events, one led to the other.  But something happened in between the two: the first event did something to your mind, and your mind triggered the second event (your feeling angry.)  What is that something that was in your mind?  Shame?  Fear?  A reflex ingrained in childhood?  Find out.

When someone says something to you, do not dwell on what was said, but ask yourself why it was said.

When he starts nitpicking, acknowledge what he said by repeating it with an even tone to show that you are not emotionally affected.  Ask him questions about other parts of your code that you think are important.  Have the questions ready ahead of time.

His nitpicking may be his way to put you down.  So, if you get upset, he has succeeded.

What's on the surface is often a compensation for what is underneath.  So, what does his "loudness" try to distract you from?

Be always respectful.  But don't take the two too seriously.  Ask yourself what you need out of this job besides the paycheck.  A sense of worthiness?  A sense of belonging?  Make sure you are not looking for things where they don't exist or misplaced.  Your worthiness is inside you, not a gift from others.

 

 

 

 

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