I have stopped caring about all that

Whatever the college they choose, save money is the most important thing.

Cost and payoff must be matching.  If kids guaduate with a lot of debt, then it's a bad choice, no matter how good it sounds. 

With little or no debt, then go find a job that pays enough for basics. That's a good start.

After that, it's their own businese. Mom and dad could retire from the parental duties for good.

They could choose to live whatever life they like, just don't come back to ask more. And I have none to offer.