安静内向的孩子申请大学真吃亏,看了一段A is for Admission,

来源: 数与形 2019-10-26 09:17:02 [] [旧帖] [给我悄悄话] 本文已被阅读: 次 (2459 bytes)
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Let me give an example that took place at Dartmouth during a reading retreat, when the whole admissions office gets together, discusses strategies and priorities for the upcoming year, and then reads through actual case studies from the current year's class. All thirteen of us prepared the five case studies the night before so we could read our write-ups aloud and then see how people voted. The biggest disagreement concerned an extremely subtle case of a girl who came from a very humble background. She knew early on that she wanted to be a veterinarian, and she had started working ten hours a week and all summer for two years in a vet's office to obtain firsthand experience. Veterinary medicine was her passion, and you could see throughout all her class work and activities that she was preparing for a career in the field. All her recommendations stressed that she was very quiet but that when she did contribute to class, she almost always offered a tremendous and insightful thought that really turned the classroom into a live arena for debate. One even referred to her as something like a "creative whirlwind of ideas." Though all her teachers said she was modest and quiet, no one said that she was a low impact person who just blended in with the scenery. On the contrary, they all pointed to the fact that she just didn't blather on and on about what she knew, as some students did, but, rather, that her idea was to follow the discussion intently and then to interject her point as things became more interesting.

What became immediately evident in our follow-up discussion was that nearly all the old-guard people in the office immediately latched onto her teachers' remarks about the quiet aspect of her character, stressing that she would be a low-impact person at Dartmouth and would never add to class discussion because she'd be afraid to speak up. In other words, they totally ignored the body of the recommendations, which stressed that she always had meaningful contributions and that she just waited until the right moment to share her thoughts. Based on this information, only two out of thirteen people voted to accept her.

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在社会上也是 -tibuko- 给 tibuko 发送悄悄话 tibuko 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:26:46

quiet是敏感词,在推荐信里杀伤力极大 -skyport- 给 skyport 发送悄悄话 skyport 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:27:56

读了这个,更看好你家开朗健谈的老二。 -数与形- 给 数与形 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:30:32

他有两大弱势:加州,小中男:( -skyport- 给 skyport 发送悄悄话 skyport 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:34:52

应该主要是你们校内同学间的竞争 -数与形- 给 数与形 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:54:23

对了,昨天还让大家建议你去读这本书,给大家一个总结。 -吹着吹着就牛了- 给 吹着吹着就牛了 发送悄悄话 吹着吹着就牛了 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:30:53

我读了一个chapter,除了这段让人气愤外,别的没啥新东西。 -数与形- 给 数与形 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:32:17

大部头的俺恐怕啃不动:) -skyport- 给 skyport 发送悄悄话 skyport 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:33:39

你不觉得美国文化就是喜欢trump 这种上来就为自己说的吗 -545f- 给 545f 发送悄悄话 545f 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:28:09

西方文化如此。 -Rockeymountain- 给 Rockeymountain 发送悄悄话 Rockeymountain 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:29:40

可大学应该包容各方面的人才,不能要求数学家也个个都是social butterfly吧, -数与形- 给 数与形 发送悄悄话 (136 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:34:41

LOL:“party上大家一起做数学题”。确实也需要。 -N.- 给 N. 发送悄悄话 N. 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 11:42:34

那正是他憧憬的party,哈哈 -数与形- 给 数与形 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 13:18:39

真正被认为有潜力的数学家还是会收的一些的,学校里有什么social活动都不参加的大牛。只是这个女学生没被认为是那一类的吧。 -MMMMM06- 给 MMMMM06 发送悄悄话 MMMMM06 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/27/2019 postreply 07:04:33

好像考虑重点是孩子是否能在上课讨论时做贡献。推debate 吧。 -greenoasis- 给 greenoasis 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:40:57

千万别,最后气坏家长就惨了。 -Rockeymountain- 给 Rockeymountain 发送悄悄话 Rockeymountain 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:47:58

说起推debate, 孩子组织里全是小印。不知道中国孩子都哪里去了 -545f- 给 545f 发送悄悄话 545f 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:52:17

我们这里是对半。小印是真能砍嘴上没把门的。小中是要说就是言之有物。这个不特指debate. 是泛泛观察。 -greenoasis- 给 greenoasis 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:54:58

我这里Plano算华人比例很高了,一到这类活动全是小印,不可思议 -545f- 给 545f 发送悄悄话 545f 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 10:09:39

俺这里对半,小中比较热衷 -白色非色- 给 白色非色 发送悄悄话 白色非色 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 10:12:57

你们那里也是高压锅啊,各种竞赛辩论牛娃 -dengGGdeng- 给 dengGGdeng 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 10:24:28

学校资金充裕吧 -545f- 给 545f 发送悄悄话 545f 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 12:03:39

都是扯淡的门道 -lzh0007- 给 lzh0007 发送悄悄话 lzh0007 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 17:23:00

扯蛋但出来可以混CEO做做 -Helloooo- 给 Helloooo 发送悄悄话 Helloooo 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/27/2019 postreply 05:30:11

此处不留人 自有留人处,藤校看不上,their lost,你娃也没必要看上它们。 -白色非色- 给 白色非色 发送悄悄话 白色非色 的博客首页 (252 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:41:43

动脑,也要动嘴, 蛊惑人心,造势 。。。 -uncwu- 给 uncwu 发送悄悄话 uncwu 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:53:22

内向和安静是两回事,你可以看一下各类研究。内向完全不是问题,但安静的确是个问题 -糖果果- 给 糖果果 发送悄悄话 糖果果 的博客首页 (845 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 09:55:28

我咋觉得这是好事?说明大猫不适合她,真去了也难受 -dengGGdeng- 给 dengGGdeng 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 10:00:07

如果所有学校的AO都用这个标准,这孩子只能进州大了 -数与形- 给 数与形 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 10:01:29

不会都这样的:)我们选学校也有倾向性啊,我们就不喜欢大猫 -dengGGdeng- 给 dengGGdeng 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 10:02:24

这个作者认为他讲的是普遍现象。 -数与形- 给 数与形 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 10:03:42

鼓励孩子多表达,大了变化很大的 -dengGGdeng- 给 dengGGdeng 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 10:12:07

我倒觉得安静内向娃也没必要非纠结自己的安静内向,woo那类的也都是天生的 -Bachbwv- 给 Bachbwv 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 10:26:00

应该利用自身的长处,而不是跟风。当然,多多鼓励娃去多交朋友,多参与各种活动。上大学,本就是个学习与交友参半的事情。 -白色非色- 给 白色非色 发送悄悄话 白色非色 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 10:53:28

大私校没这么矫情,没办法我娃也是这样 -新年好运- 给 新年好运 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 11:02:00

大猫 理工科不强,他们更喜欢能说会道的人,有没有思想 不在考虑范围之内,这种学校不去也罢 -w12- 给 w12 发送悄悄话 w12 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 11:14:45

这本书我也看过,再加上天港贴的那个tufts 的录取视频 -红兰花花- 给 红兰花花 发送悄悄话 红兰花花 的博客首页 (383 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 12:05:18

我也觉得AO群体首先就不多元化。现在的确黑人西裔AO多了,但是还是都是软专业出身。思路也差不多 -greenoasis- 给 greenoasis 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 12:07:53

的确如此。他们录取的case都要集体投票。 -红兰花花- 给 红兰花花 发送悄悄话 红兰花花 的博客首页 (142 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 12:37:13

能说下书名吗 -JT20871- 给 JT20871 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 12:07:56

就是A is for Admission -古代的事物- 给 古代的事物 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 12:27:11

另外我觉得有很多AO不知道是本来数学就不太好,还是被热情蒙蔽了眼睛 -红兰花花- 给 红兰花花 发送悄悄话 红兰花花 的博客首页 (942 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 12:32:06

Dartmouth招的人不是这样的profile,所以还是不要去。她应该去一个真正搞学术的学校。 -出门在外7788- 给 出门在外7788 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 16:20:42

这种学校不去也罢 -虽然- 给 虽然 发送悄悄话 (145 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 18:09:01

那个州大?我喜欢这个 -jinhui20- 给 jinhui20 发送悄悄话 jinhui20 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 21:08:06

内向就搞学术吧,就算学校收了,工作之后怎么办? -sap200- 给 sap200 发送悄悄话 (145 bytes) () 10/26/2019 postreply 18:28:58

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