adult son

来源: 024 2014-12-24 09:35:55 [] [旧帖] [给我悄悄话] 本文已被阅读: 次 (21468 bytes)

My son graduated from college, has a job, and lives at home.
He has no friends, no face book, doesn't want to move out. He really wants to have friends,  but no one likes him. He tried in the past, no success. He never went to cafeteria in high school because he didn't want to eat alone. He lived in dorm the first year in college, people didn't find him interesting, so he ended up with a group students dealing with alcohol and drugs. I never understand why he could have friends like that, not good ones. He knew he shouldn’t do that, he moved back to home to focus on school. He told me he is not a happy person and he doesn't know why. I took him to church once and hoped he could find god and friends there, but he refused to go again. He went to counseling, he said the counselor didn't give any advice, just let him to talk. He didn't find that helpful, so stopped going. He uses all his free time to watch TV shows, has no interesting in anything else. I asked him if he likes travel, he said no. I could not find anything he likes to do except TV shows, concert.

It breaks my heart that he could not make any friends. Is there  a way I can help? Thank you so much for any suggestions you can give me!!!!

 

所有跟帖: 

听着像是抑郁症 -keessa- 给 keessa 发送悄悄话 (12 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 09:38:39

看看心理医生,如果有忧郁症,可以服药,并且医生会建议你去一些专门帮助这类人的组织,提高他们的social能力,结交朋友 -臭臭妈妈- 给 臭臭妈妈 发送悄悄话 臭臭妈妈 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 09:40:06

基本同意臭妈妈 -时间呢- 给 时间呢 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:31:14

上次的辅导员是个甚么样的counselor? -我爱拉氏- 给 我爱拉氏 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 09:52:41

听起来孩子没有爱好兴趣,朋友是要有共同语言的,要找一个兴趣,比如在教会带小朋友活动。 -我爱拉氏- 给 我爱拉氏 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 09:55:53

心理咨询要坚持, 可以换不同的治疗师看看, 要找到可以信任的心理咨询师才行。 -大小鳄鱼- 给 大小鳄鱼 发送悄悄话 大小鳄鱼 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 09:52:54

看医生吧 -小睿儿- 给 小睿儿 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 09:57:23

锻炼和去教会 -liveinca- 给 liveinca 发送悄悄话 liveinca 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:02:22

Get your son open up and talk to others. -RPV- 给 RPV 发送悄悄话 (104 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:03:22

good idea, he needs love and attention -liveinca- 给 liveinca 发送悄悄话 liveinca 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:05:26

看心理医生,同时推他去健身,长跑即可 -wenhaomama- 给 wenhaomama 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:05:28

对,找个trainer, 再开始跑步, 然后参加5K 长跑活动。也可以在网上和别人讨论长跑活动。 还可以和其他成年人一起上网球课 -seabright123- 给 seabright123 发送悄悄话 (223 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:29:09

小中男里这种见过. 从小就很孤独. 建议再去选一点轻松的课(community college), 写作或者艺术等, -weston- 给 weston 发送悄悄话 weston 的博客首页 (183 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:05:53

看来他内心里很想有朋友,很想改变目前的现状。 还是要找一些活动给他。 -seabright123- 给 seabright123 发送悄悄话 (397 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:08:56

这么大的孩子,都已经工作了,为什么让住家里. 应该让他住到年轻人多的地方. -秋阳照落叶- 给 秋阳照落叶 发送悄悄话 (35 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:16:39

有问题的孩子,还是在家看着点为好。住dorm不管用。 -yundao- 给 yundao 发送悄悄话 yundao 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:49:38

他身材如何?很胖吗? -七把叉叉- 给 七把叉叉 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:18:47

建议让他去gym,找一个personal trainer,开始锻炼。 -七把叉叉- 给 七把叉叉 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:20:18

Do you know why he is so unpopular? He seems to be a good person -说不完的家务事- 给 说不完的家务事 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:20:34

先带他到你最信任的朋友圈,让他交往,体会成功的乐趣,克服恐惧。再慢慢的让他走出去。 -BDXDL- 给 BDXDL 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:25:32

上一门健身课强壮自己,闲暇时间定点做义工,既可以和人交往,又让他体会到自己的价值, -jiandany- 给 jiandany 发送悄悄话 jiandany 的博客首页 (103 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:33:02

他跟你的关系好吗?看起来小时候在家里受到忽视 -lisa99- 给 lisa99 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 10:44:48

建议打游戏,现在的男孩子都打游戏,一打游戏,就有很多朋友了。 -yhr- 给 yhr 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:05:12

多运动,多户外运动 -侧卫1- 给 侧卫1 发送悄悄话 侧卫1 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:06:32

这个解决不了交朋友问题。户外都是喜欢一个人野跑的。 -yhr- 给 yhr 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:09:32

去Gym打球,教会也是人多的地方 -侧卫1- 给 侧卫1 发送悄悄话 侧卫1 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:18:58

他得会打才行,否则很尴尬的,教会一样,人虽然多,没有共同话题也别扭 -jiandany- 给 jiandany 发送悄悄话 jiandany 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:33:00

运动可以减少忧郁 -侧卫1- 给 侧卫1 发送悄悄话 侧卫1 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 20:52:05

thank all for yoursuggestions! -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (538 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:09:43

need ideas about how to meet people. -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:11:43

你可以让你的好朋友来家聚会,他慢慢加入你们的聊天 -whsh- 给 whsh 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:15:07

Tried. We speak Chinese and he is not interested in our topics -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:28:59

你们自己喜不喜欢Party?如果为了儿子,你愿不愿意多办些Party,邀请人来你家?可能让你儿子能加入进去? -cat64- 给 cat64 发送悄悄话 cat64 的博客首页 (119 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:19:19

We have seen three psychologists that we picked according to rev -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:32:51

不建议教堂,这么大孩子一时半会儿不容易融进去。喜欢吃的话,上品酒课? -jiandany- 给 jiandany 发送悄悄话 jiandany 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:24:21

He doesn't lke alcohol, never drinks at home even during hollida -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:36:07

找一个烹饪学校的课,让他去上。 -七把叉叉- 给 七把叉叉 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:41:32

He needs to get laid, happy sex makes a happy man :) -网恋无罪- 给 网恋无罪 发送悄悄话 网恋无罪 的博客首页 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:33:18

He needs friends, then find girl friend -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:38:58

找个女友,老妈教育不了的,就全靠老婆接棒完成任务了。 -yundao- 给 yundao 发送悄悄话 yundao 的博客首页 (38 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:36:21

only one child. need find girl friend first -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:40:43

听上去是个乖孩子,千万不要再给他压力了 -民工- 给 民工 发送悄悄话 民工 的博客首页 (1556 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 11:51:22

I really appreciate your post ! I was thinking to push him out -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 12:30:13

做些义工吧,有时见到比他更需要帮助的人会让他触动并激发他做事的热情 -huanhuanlele- 给 huanhuanlele 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 12:03:38

he is always tired. sometimes he won't go for movies because o -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 12:41:21

check for Asperger's Syndrome -小合才露尖尖角- 给 小合才露尖尖角 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 12:05:28

从小就这样吗?高中阶段如何?受过什么挫折吗 -DCH- 给 DCH 发送悄悄话 (96 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 12:08:38

it is hard to please him even when he was a baby -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 12:32:57

叫他背上背包,去西藏,去沙漠,徒步旅行一次。 -飞*星- 给 飞*星 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 12:54:42

他不出去,但有没有在网上和人聊天的习惯?我知道有好些孩子不爱社交,但喜欢网聊。 -rancho2008- 给 rancho2008 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 13:42:33

no Facebook, do interactions with people even on Internet -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 15:49:58

no Facebook, no interactions with people even on Internet -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 15:52:32

你附近有Sierra Club开的课吗?我老大也是有点宅,参加了他们的hikingclass,兴趣大增,后来从露营到欧洲背包游, -rancho2008- 给 rancho2008 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 18:31:39

Find their webste -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 18:43:16

Thanks for the info! There is one nearby, I, -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 18:44:44

Thanks for the info! There is one nearby, I, -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 18:44:44

I will find out what my son can do there. is there anything he m -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 18:50:02

Find their webste -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 18:43:17

小时候怎样?有点象不严重的自闭,他想朋友,但不会社交的方式。 -五月草- 给 五月草 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 16:07:40

Autism? It is 50% genetic, check family history. -freecall- 给 freecall 发送悄悄话 freecall 的博客首页 (180 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 18:00:03

He is an American. I will try to put that idea in his head. Tha -024- 给 024 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/24/2014 postreply 18:39:15

人的wellbeing的感觉是由大脑里的四种化学物质决定的 -sherpa- 给 sherpa 发送悄悄话 (575 bytes) () 12/25/2014 postreply 08:50:10

孩子是个好孩子,读着这位妈妈的贴真是很sad。健康坛的医生能帮上什么吗? -seabright123- 给 seabright123 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 12/25/2014 postreply 19:09:32

请您先登陆,再发跟帖!

发现Adblock插件

如要继续浏览
请支持本站 请务必在本站关闭/移除任何Adblock

关闭Adblock后 请点击

请参考如何关闭Adblock/Adblock plus

安装Adblock plus用户请点击浏览器图标
选择“Disable on www.wenxuecity.com”

安装Adblock用户请点击图标
选择“don't run on pages on this domain”