儿童虐待并非中华文化专利。在 美国儿童虐待是个蛮常见的社会固疾，需要大力反对和清 除的。

social ills are filled in any culture, not just Chinese culture. You seem to have some bias against Chinese culture. 

Find something positive about Chinese culture, for the benefit of your own children (if you have any).

Psychologically speaking, the best parenting style is the one with high expectation and warmth to their children. Here "high expectation" may include expectation of children to work hard. So really there is nothing wrong for Chinese parents to hold "no pains no gains" view, to which you seem to have a hard time in understanding.