I',1.Your ex either is selfish and irresponsible, or has some psychological problem. Apparently he does want this daughter. Please don’t give this precious little girl to him. He is not a loving father. He won't give her love.
2. No marriage, no live-in boyfriend either before your daughter turns 18. This is a crazy sick world. Some men prey on single mother with minor children, they want marry single mom because they want to get the children. A lot pedophiles out there. There is statistic. Be careful. This is not sacrific. This is our obligation. She did choose to come into this world. We should not sacrifice any child.
3. Your daughter needs unconditional love. She needs to build a strong root of self-esteem. “Five love language” is a good book to read. Spending quality time with her is better than sending her to any lessons.
4. Going back to China is a very good idea. She will have an extended family, a father figure in the house, and love, the unconditional love from grandparents. I vote for this option!!!
5. Be a mother bear! Protect your daughter. We are stewards of our children, not the owner. Human being lost the animal instinct. Think about how mother bear protects her baby.
6. If you really want to give her to the dad, I would rather suggest you put her for adoption. A lot loving families want to adopt.
I'm a simgle mom. I understand what you went through. Be strong ! Be a happy, mature, complete mom!