Leadership does not conflict with 节约. A man can be a great leader innovation while being frugal, promoting nature resource conservation. 节约 is a way to respect others also. Not sure how rich you are. If your wife spends a lot of money on your boys clothes, food etc (say 30% of your income), probably you will ask your wife to cut spending :-).
What's your definition of leadership? Simply saying that is harmful to your boys too.