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Smoke from the past

Just one twilight,
Just one joint,
Just one delight,
We shared ever.
Your hairs
are waving in the wind.
And my memories
are flowing in the smoke forever.

Autorank Total 1, professional similarity 4 (of 10), concrete vs abstract -1 (of 2), noun/verb/etc order -0.6 (of 1), lines start the same -1 (of -2), too long/short -1 (of -1), too many capitalized -0.6 (of -1)

刚好也是俺写的第一首，I intentionally used the word "joint", probably this comment is right on the "joint".

Archan Mehta - What a poem. Romantic. You have a way with words. Please keep up the good work. 

有时间会写一个关于joint的故事。

 

 

Maple leaves on the wall

In the spring, you bid farewell to me for the north,
for the snow that has not melted.
Leave me facing the silent wall,
where you painted flaming maple leaves
clinging to the twigs in the autumn wind.
You adjure me constantly-
Come to me,
when the maple leaves fall and cover your palms.

Autorank Total 7.8, professional similarity 5 (of 10), concrete vs abstract 2 (of 2), noun/verb/etc order 0.9 (of 1), too many capitalized -0.1 (of -1)