Desperately need your help.

My hu*****and divorced more than 10 years ago and the court gave my hu*****and the sole custody of his daughter, Beth, who is now 14 and half years old. The court also ruled his ex-wife to pay my hu*****and $500/month for child support, which she never paid. There is nothing my hu*****and can do since she lives in Japan. My hu*****and and I have been married for 6 years. Beth has been so hateful and makes everyone miserable for 3 years. She doesn’t care about anyone in our house except herself and her boyfriend. All she ever does is to yell at us and sometimes curse at us. We paid her to baby sit for us from 3:30pm to 5:30pm or 6pm. When I came home from work, I saw my 2 year old baby sitting on top of the table and Beth was sitting on the couch doing her own thing, either on her laptop or talking on her cell phone to her boyfriend. One time I came home, my baby fell asleep on the couch with her clothes soaking wet and Beth did not even know. One night I had to cook for Beth, I heard a thud, I ran from the kitchen to the family room and asked what happened and she did not know. Lately she can’t stand living with us. So we decide to send her to Japan to live with her Mom. She doesn’t want to go to Japan because she does not speak the language and mostly she does not want to leave her boyfriend.

She left today and when she tried to board the JAL (Japanese Airline), they stopped her and called my hu*****and. Because we bought her a one-way ticket, they would not allow her to board because she did not have a Japanese passport. Beth was born in Japan and we thought she had dual citizenship. (I guess his ex-wife has to submit the paperwork to apply the Japanese Passport for Beth.) So we ended up spending $3750 to buy a one-way ticket back but it was refundable for a fee. Now she is on the JAL and will be in Japan in 2 hours. My hu*****and’s ex-wife called my hu*****and 5 minutes ago and asked my hu*****and to send her $1000/month starting this month because she said she had to send Beth to private school since she did not speak Japanese. My hu*****and thinks it is ridiculous because she hasn’t paying $500/month for ten years and now she wants $1000/month from us. But if we do not send her the money, I don’t know what she will do. If she does not submit the paperwork for Beth, Beth can’t even stay in Japan more than 90 days. She might send Beth back or she might want to sue us for the child support. I remember she said that if Beth did not like Japan, she would take Beth back to USA and find an organization for troubled kids and we had to pay for it.

What should we do? We are not happy dumping her. But we tried everything. We took care of her. We took her to dentist, family doctor, etc. We took her to the psychiatrist. She refused to take the prescription meds because she said it made her drowsy. She is only happy for the moment. She is only nice when she needs something. She doesn’t want to live with us any more either. She also will be a bad influence to our 2 year old baby. The only thing we can think of is to send her to her Mom. My hu*****and has taken care of her for 14 and half years, now it’s his ex-wife’s term to be a Mom for 3 and half years. What should we do to make her Mom to take some responsibilities eventually?

What will happen if she sends Beth back by herself? What will happen if she takes us to court? What will happen if she take her to an agency and want us to pay? How can we make her Mom to be responsible for Beth for the remaining 3 and half years? We desperately need your help. Please help. Thank you.

所有跟帖： 

• 我请教一下 -傻等啦- ♀ (113 bytes) () 01/07/2010 postreply 22:10:57

• 回复：我请教一下 -很想开心- ♀ (1993 bytes) () 01/07/2010 postreply 22:58:06

• Of course, she hates you. -CyberCat- ♂ (597 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 05:59:15

• BS - "But as long as you guys can get by, no savings is not such -翡翠湖- ♀ (64 bytes) () 01/13/2010 postreply 11:02:33

• 多谢回答，我想 -傻等啦- ♀ (224 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 08:20:09

• 单身老猫, 拜托给一点意见. -很想开心- ♀ (0 bytes) () 01/07/2010 postreply 23:00:12

• 诸葛亮来了:赶紧给她妈妈寄$1000. -能否叫你一声同志- ♂ (512 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 07:56:49

• 应该贴到子女教育坛去. 会得到很多意见的. -忍住不说- ♀ (0 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 07:43:23

• 真不能找后妈，当娘的要认识到这一点。 -自由自在吧- ♀ (0 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 08:41:43

• 除了同情可怜这个14岁的女孩子，别的无话可说。 -xuanji- ♂ (0 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 09:13:55

• 还是自己检讨吧 -冰羽心- ♀ (414 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 09:15:10

• 回复：还是自己检讨吧 -hz82000- ♀ (50 bytes) () 01/10/2010 postreply 15:10:37

• ^&^$&*#*&@^$@! -notmobile- ♂ (44 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 09:48:53

• 让人不由得想起小时候的歌谣“小白菜儿”，这个后妈太厉害了！ -xiaodoudouma- ♀ (0 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 10:14:21

• 可怜什么？这个女儿简直是骄纵加狠毒。继子继女多了，有象她这样对待自己同父异母的弟弟吗？ -翡翠湖- ♀ (0 bytes) () 01/13/2010 postreply 11:17:44

• 晚了，因为你从没爱过她 -昭君出塞因地制宜- ♂ (149 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 09:58:03

• LZ -翡翠湖- ♀ (0 bytes) () 01/13/2010 postreply 11:04:00

• LZ没有做错。 -翡翠湖- ♀ (118 bytes) () 01/13/2010 postreply 11:08:50

• It's hard to be a stepmother. -Aidanmom- ♀ (317 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 10:04:50

• this is so sad. brought tears to my eyes... -傻等啦- ♀ (0 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 10:15:30

• This is so stupid.! -能否叫你一声同志- ♂ (215 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 10:22:19

• In reality, no matter how well a stepmother does, -Aidanmom- ♀ (0 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 11:22:13

• it is not good enough. People second guess stepmoms. -AidanMom- ♀ (219 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 11:25:07

• 所以说后妈难当。但关键是他们把孩子送走了。 -Poof- ♀ (0 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 11:32:51

• 从买衣服这件事上看，你女儿并未有过分之处啊。 -peewee- ♀ (140 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 10:29:24

• 从买衣服这件事上看，LZ并未有过分之处啊。 -能否叫你一声同志- ♂ (496 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 10:54:06

• You gotta be kidding me! -CyberCat- ♂ (219 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 11:16:13

• YOU gotta be kidding me! -翡翠湖- ♀ (136 bytes) () 01/13/2010 postreply 11:12:43

• 我并没说LZ教育女儿money management不对， -peewee- ♀ (124 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 11:26:25

• 后妈/继女的问题是双向的,解决问题也需要双方努力. -能否叫你一声同志- ♂ (736 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 11:27:31

• 有道理。就是有一条 -Poof- ♀ (40 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 11:31:49

• LZ根本没有什么问题.问题的根子在那个做丈夫的身上. -bushiba- ♀ (258 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 11:42:29

• agree -rlsrls08- ♀ (0 bytes) () 01/11/2010 postreply 20:10:04

• 楼主是来寻求法律帮助的，怎么那么多personal judgement呀 -contested- ♀ (509 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 12:04:07

• 同意這位朋友的看法. -單身老貓- ♂ (581 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 12:31:44

• Beth stays in US and mom sees counciling on parenting. -林依- ♀ (0 bytes) () 01/08/2010 postreply 12:55:19