Mr. Penis要求涨工资，被拒，为何？（英文）

The Day the Penis Asked for a Raise

I, the Penis, hereby request a raise in salary for the following reasons:
I do physical labor;
I work at great depth;
I plunge headfirst into everything I do;
I work in a damp environment;
I work in a dark workplace that has poor ventilation;
I work in high temperatures;
My work exposes me to contagious diseases.
Sincerely,
P. Niss

The response from the management:

Dear P. Niss:
After assessing your request, and considering the arguments you have raise, the administration rejects your request for the following reasons:
You do not work 8 hours a day straight;
You fall asleep after a brief work period;
You do not always follow the orders of the management team;
You do not stay in your designated area and are often seen visiting other locations;
You do not take initiative----you need to be pressured and stimulated in order to start working;
You leave the workplace rather messy at the end of your shift;
You do not always observe necessary safety regulations, such as wearing the correct protective clothing;
You will retire well before you are 65;
You are unable to work double shifts;
You sometimes leave your designated work area before you have completed you assigned task;
And if that were not all, you have been seen constantly entering and exiting the workplace carrying two suspicious-looking bags.
Sincerely,
V. Gina

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• 哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈 -烛龙- ♂ (0 bytes) () 02/14/2009 postreply 21:37:15

• 泰黄了！！ -botong- ♂ (0 bytes) () 02/14/2009 postreply 21:45:35

• 觉得还有一条: 孤独-----哥儿几个长大了,就再没见过面儿. -铁塔哥- ♂ (0 bytes) () 02/15/2009 postreply 07:18:03