Help him find his self

 

It seems that he is searching for perfection.  But in reality, he is unwilling to be responsible for the outcome.

That unwillingness stems from his lacking the sense of himself.  His subjective-self is small and weak, unable to cover much of his objective-self, which in turn seeks cover, such as your constant praise.

Ask him often of what he feels, like where to go, what to eat, what to wear, etc., and then follow through.  Ask about his opinion on something, and there's no right or wrong answers.  Ask him to tell you what he thinks, not what he thinks you want to hear.  Give him all the time he needs to come up with an idea, don't rush him.  Show your interest in what he thinks.

You yoursef refrain from blaming him or anyone else.  Admit to him that you failed at something and what you'd do next time to make it better.  Show him that failure is OK.  He is valued because he has the courage to shoulder himself.

As he ages, hope that his subjective-self will grow larger and stronger to cover more of his objective-self, thus become more self-aware, a sign of maturity.

 

(Nice cursive.  The Cricket Magazines should help him get ideas.  "Philosophy for Kids" by White teaches kids how to think.  Golf is a good sport, buy him a #6 club, used, from a driving range for $10 and a bucket of balls, no need for fancy clubs until he can swing correctly.)

 

所有跟帖： 

• thank you very much! -温妮燕- ♀ (139 bytes) () 03/28/2021 postreply 18:48:10

• Also, praise his effort, not just good result. -One1618- ♂ (0 bytes) () 03/29/2021 postreply 06:47:44