Pleas be kind and reasonable to your kids

I did not write this. This is a cut and paste.

Our kids have enough pressure and problems outside.  Be kind, be reasonable, and be quiet sometimes.

 

"Her essay starts out with how her mom (we are both Chinese) would scream and rage at her. She describes things that are extremely and uncomfortably familiar. Some examples: hiding in her room and dreading mom's footsteps coming down the hallway, crying, feeling degraded and powerless, swearing to herself she'll never raise her own kids this way, etc etc. But then she goes on to write about how she came around to her mom's point of view. That "maybe Mom has a reason to be angry and I do need to do better in school. Mom works so hard to provide for me, after all." The rest of the essay is about how she learns "humility and empathy" and learns to apologize to her mom and now they have a good relationship. 

I just feel so, so conflicted. Firstly, this is triggering some very unpleasant memories for me when I was younger. Secondly, I feel like the only thing I can do (and I'm still uncomfortable doing it) is to just look over the grammar and send it back without much other feedback. If I'm honest, I don't think the fact that she learned to acquiesce to her mom's verbal abuse is a good thing. I think it's sad that this girl was broken down and basically had to learn to survive by identifying with her abuser. To be completely blunt: I don't feel like this is a good essay. And I don't want to advise someone younger than me that this is the correct way."

 

 

所有跟帖： 

• 中国女人中国奶奶心态不正，对待孩子苛责的太多。 -FollowNature- ♂ (0 bytes) () 10/31/2020 postreply 06:48:00