孝顺 vs love and honor

 

"Filial piety" is not a concept that is promoted in the West.  The little they are taught from their Chinese parents cannot withstand the onslaught from the SexEd they get from school.

Then their value in this regard becomes void.  Unless:

They are also taught love of self, love of family, love of neighbors, and as well as "honor thy father and mother" (one of the Ten Commandments in the Bible.)

Otherwise, they will fall through the gap between the two value systems, like what you lamented in your post.

Many parents will rush to shower their children with "unconditional love," in the hope that their love will be reciprocated in the future.  The results are often disappointing.

Love your children and see to it that their needs are met, with the resources you have.  But, also give your children the opportunity to earn some of the love.  They'll treasure the things more if they have earned them.  It is part of human nature.  Respect that.

It is also conditioned; a reflex that is engrained in the brain.  If you've watched "All is Well (都挺好)", what drove the daughter to take care of the father?  It's that longing, longing for the love and care from her parents when she was little.  That force is more powerful than any teaching of 孝顺.