When I took my son back to China a few years back,

I did not concern much about safety. It was my sister's mother-in-law who brought the topic to my attention, pointing out that I should not let anyone take my son out, which was exactly what I was doing then. I had to admit that it was a bit of shock to me but I appreciated her advice. After that, I read / heard about kidnapping accidents that truly scared me greatly. I could not imagine what would happen to my kids (one more now) if they ever get kidnapped. How I would live the rest of my life without knowing where they are. Just as of this morning, I warned my kids again before dropping them at school, "Never ever go with strangers or even your friends' parents unless mom tells you ahead of time." I believe that I am a little paranoid over their safety, especially when the media disclose the detailed misfortunes the kidnapped kids went through. Your hu*****and could be overconcerned too, for a good reason though.

But I have a friend from Shanghai with three kids aged from 5-12. Each summer, she would send the kids on the plane and entrust them to the flight attendants. Her parents would pick up the kids from the airport in Shanghai. The return trip is arranged the same way. It has gone quite well so far. People are just different because I myself could not do that. I could not even allow my kids to go back to China with my own parents because my parents constantly talk about how safe China is (which indicates they may not be on good guard against possible evils).

For your hu*****and, if he is non-abusive in nature, just a typical hubby with a bit strange personality, then try to be sweet and work your way through his heart. Don't overdo it, though. A little each time. Agree with him in sincerity and earnest on simply anything and satisfy him in other ways as wel. Once his ego is boosted, his guard would be down. Make him feel treasured and important in words. In action, do what you deem is right. This is not to deceive him but a little marital tactics. It takes practice and wisdom to make him vocalize the things you actually long to do.The eventual goal is that he would "swim through the shark-infested water to fetch the lemonade for you". I speak from experience and it works.My hubby would beat yours in all you listed. But now things are working towards a more desirable direction. But when I slip, things would turn ugly so I have to be diligent. I am willing to go through the trouble because I do not want the marriage to fall apart or go dull. Neither do I want my kids to suffer from all the tension that may come from a pair of grouchy and unhappy parents.

If you are willing, there would a way. Good luck!