以后当爷爷奶奶的，准备保持点距离吗？这位奶奶被喷了

Dear Care and Feeding: My Manipulative Mother is Now a Manipulative Grandmother (msn.com)

其中有一条：奶奶坚持用自己给孙女取的明显女性化的名字。

Dear Care and Feeding,

My mother is a difficult person. Someone who only met her briefly might be struck by how bubbly and sweet she is, but I overdosed on that long ago and have seen the manipulative person behind the mask. My wife and I recently had our second child, a daughter whom we’ve given a very feminine name, but we mostly call her by a short, ambisexual nickname (along the lines of Sam for Samantha or Max for Maxine). My mother, however, keeps referring to her by a different and more feminine nickname, one we dislike. I realize that children will accrue different names over time and that it’s not that unusual for a grandparent to have a different pet name for a grandchild than the name the parents use, and I also know that this is not a very high-stakes matter. But I do think it’s a low-key example of her being controlling, and in this case doubles as policing gender norms. I might feel differently about the use of this name if it were coming from a different person (or even just a different grandparent). How justified would I be in insisting she use the same nickname we do?