谢谢立兄的回应。那是我不知道寄北是什么意思，所以用问号取代。我喜欢你的版本里那种对话的感觉的引入！

还有把ba 给省去。巴的音比较重，打破那种私语的感觉。

 

You ask me when to come back I can not tell
the pond is now sweling by the Mount with the autumn night rain
And you ask me when we would trim the candle by the west window at night 
did we Once say it would be when the Mount was in a night autumn rain