hey i understand u completely

it's not your fault or anybody's. it's just so common that after 8+ yrs of marriage, u both lost interests in each other, and yet you seek attention and love which, unfortunately, ur hubby didn't do much to secure ur feeling...therefore, you wanted to get attention/care/love somewhere else, which lead to what had happened between you and the navy officer. it was just a crush, which could lead to somewhere if he could've stayed, but that's not how the story you told us, so my best advice to you is just forget about him, guys like him, travel from ports to ports and what they do at their feet time? finding girls! he sounded like a decent guy but most likely things like this won't go anywhere.