From Spark to Warmth SeetoMD
Why Passion Fades but Love Endures
Do you remember The Music of the Night fom The Phantom of the Opera?
When night falls, the senses sharpen, imagination awakens, and our
Ventral tegmental area
guard quietly lowers —just like the beginning of love.
Everything feels intense, vIvid, and a little dangerous.
At the start of love, your heartbeat quickens, your breath shortens, and your whole attention is drawn to one per-son. Reason steps aside-only
Nucleus accumbens (reward)
focus and desire remain-and
Amygdala that beautiful uncertainty.
(anxiety)
From a neurologic view, both the dopamine and anxiety - systems ignite together. The brain's reward centers light up-but the anxiety circuits had quieted-excited yet uneasy.
Over time, the spark turns into warmth. Helen Fisher scanneo couples married for more than twenty years who still said they were "deeply in love." Their reward centers still lit up-but the anxiety circuits had companionship became more active.
Love didn't vanish, it simply changed its shape-from the thrill of pursuit to the calm of connection.
Even when the reward centers rest, the prefrontal light keeps love alive. This is what we call unconditional love.