【七律】无题

【七律】无题

 

一百年中不共船，共船便可渡百年。

钟情何限雨云内，有爱难穷芳草边。

未卜先知应一命，相睽后觉是前缘。

千秋万载时光尽，落日婵娟共枕眠。

 

Untitled

 

We had been on our separate ways for a hundred years, in preparation for an eventual encounter.

Now finally we're on the same boat, on time's river, together to ride it through another hundred years.

 

We have come to realization that love isn't limited to physical intimacy such as that between clouds and rains.

Love is endless when we have each other by our side.

 

Without resorting to divination we already had foreknowledge that we'll share the same fate.

At first sight we knew that our loving each other has long been decided before our birth.

 

Even after thousands of years, even after time ends, the setting sun and the rising moon share the same pillow, the earth.

 

(© December 6, 2023, godog)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

所有跟帖： 

• 欣赏老师佳作，前二联尤好 -lilly28- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 10:00:01

• 谢谢Lily诗友鼓励，很高兴你喜欢拙作 -godog- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 19:11:45

• 两首并赏！喜欢！问好 -天玉之- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 12:02:37

• 谢谢玉教。问好 -godog- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 19:12:23

• 看来楼外风景不错，睡觉不用挂窗帘。好律！ -白九- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 12:09:15

• 谢谢白九老师临读鼓励。我还得琢磨一下老师这句话的意思：）） -godog- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 19:14:32

• 玩笑！ -白九- ♂ (114 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 20:33:31

• 白九老师这玩笑开得雅。白九老师只是稍微转了个弯我就没跟上：） -godog- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/07/2023 postreply 21:40:47

• 这首风格很独特，有现代诗的影子。另我觉得你的英文功底很好。多才多艺，触类旁通！ -作业本- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 12:35:33

• 作业兄观察敏锐。我主要是写现代诗的，最近在尝试在古体诗中揉合现代诗的手法，思想，元素，看能不能用旧瓶装新酒，如果能扩展这 -godog- ♂ (63 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 19:20:07

• 写的真棒。 -苏牧- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 12:50:25

• 谢谢苏兄临读鼓励 -godog- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 19:21:19

• 再赞！ -方外居士- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 13:04:37

• 再谢方外兄 -godog- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 19:21:53

• 尤喜首聯，風趣直白的口語，而完全入律。 -中间小谢- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/06/2023 postreply 22:00:05

• 谢谢诗友临读及喜欢拙作 -godog- ♂ (0 bytes) () 12/07/2023 postreply 20:26:22

• ＂渡百年＂的百字难道没有出律？ -惜也- ♀ (0 bytes) () 12/07/2023 postreply 04:14:30

• 惜也老师是对的，这里的百字出律了，当时想过换用千字，想想还是保留了百字，觉得头两句重复百年和共船这两个词带来的效果的好处 -godog- ♂ (108 bytes) () 12/07/2023 postreply 20:20:18

• 知道出律，权衡再三而予保留，也是学诗的真实心路。但是，这句这样写，恐怕不行。 -惜也- ♀ (179 bytes) () 12/08/2023 postreply 02:31:39

• 谢谢惜也老师再次留评，惜也老师可能是格律的完美主义者，我不是，我容许有一两处出律，除了每句的第七 -godog- ♂ (228 bytes) () 12/09/2023 postreply 10:09:41