上下片连接松了点。结句不写景而写情可能更好些。个见。

来源: 曲未平于 2015-01-10 08:55:26 [博客] [旧帖] [给我悄悄话] 本文已被阅读：次

WENXUECITY.COM does not represent or guarantee the truthfulness, accuracy, or reliability of any of communications posted by other users.