"We strive to realize our long-cherished dream. But this is by no means an illusory dream, because it's true.” 中的But 用得不好。既然你开宗明义说是来陈述中国立场的，be assertive，语气转折干嘛？结尾说这个梦是真的，不免孩子气的一厢情愿。应该宣示中国的决心去实现自己的梦想。 该这样说：
We strive to realize our long-cherished dream. In fact, it is not a dream but our unwavering will and God-given right.
"It is a Chinese territory with yellow soil, and a river nurturing ancient Chinese culture is nurturing its growth.” 这句有点awkward。It代指什么？我会这样说：
This peninsula is a Chinese territory with yellow soil and a river nurturing ancient, present and future Chinese civilization.
"In this land, Confucius and Mencius, who are famous all over the world, have exerted great influence not only on China but also on the world's civilization.” 这句中famous应该换成revered。"exerted great influence”在外交场合不免有点沙文主义的味道。我认为应该改成have had benevolent influence.
实话实说，我对Wellington Koo这样的人的文笔，是有更高期望的。
