I have seen and heard so many "Martin".

I feel that many Chinese girls are attracted to this type of guys because they speak Chinese and seem to know a lot about China.

That is great! You need somone who appreciate your background and communication is very very important.

But the most importantly, a girl really needs someone that appreciate who you are, not just the exotic look like wonderbear pointed out. Martin is very attracted to Chinese women, which brought him half way around the world to learn Chinese, dated a Chinese girl and finally married her.

The marriage went downhill sadly because he didn't accept and appreciate what Katie had to offer in their marriage. He wants her to get a degree, to be perfect in English and finally to locate a gainful employment. He was always asking her to do many things while he fell short in providing her with much support. A great marriage needs a good balance between the two individuals. And I guess Katie finally gave up because the relationship was just getting ....well.... a little "oppressive".

Lessons ? I don't really know. I hate to put down "a rule of thumb" for others to follow. Every relationship is different. Maybe we should just be a little cautious when a eligible bachelor runs into you and tell you that "he dreams about dating a Chinese girl since he was five......" Stop right there and wonder if he really was attracted to you as a person or your oriental look alone.