fall for my co worker and feel so shamed

有一 个男同 事，已经结 婚。我也已 经结 婚。May be because his wife is second generation of Chinese, so we felt closer to each other at the beginning. 但 是后 来后 来事 情 发 展的有 些不对 劲，他有 时会偷 偷看我。我也会偷看他. Then I found out I kind of fall into him and I started to behave unnaturally. His cubic was right beside me, after he found out that we kept on checking each out and I started to behave weird, he moved to another row. After he changed his cubic, our relationship is still ok. He came to me twice every week to say hi to me but I can feel that he was neverous every time he talked to me. Because he moved away from me, so I felt a little bit shamed so从此就在也没 有主 动打给 他打过招 呼。 因 为我 的座 位在门 口，他每 次出 去都 要经 过我，每 次他都显得浑 身不自 然 。我想最 好他路 过是与他打 个招 呼，可 是又怕被他认 为我过于主 动。而 且我觉得他搬 走让我很没 有面 子。于 是关 系越来越僵，最后搞 到就 算彼 此一 个月没 有见 面，他路 过我身 边是，我也 是连个招 呼也不 打， 而 且还作 出一 副很忙得样 子。但 是有 时依 然能感 到彼 此偷 看对 方。每 次在我发 现他偷 看我之后，他都会大 声谈 论他多 么喜 欢他的妻 子。今 天早晨双 方又有 意无 意中对 视，我很 快把头扭到了一 边, 作 出一 副羞 涩状( hate myself to do this)。This afternoon, when he had a chat with a co worker beside me, he spoke very loudly“I love my wife so much, she is priceless to me” I felt so shamed after hearing he saying that, so I decided to do something. When he passed by my cubic this afternoon, I pretended nothing happened during the last couple of months and said “hi, you, you don’t talk to me anymore” Then he showed a very innocent face and said “oh, I just have been busying and I will talk to you next week”. I said” no worry, I am just kidding”. He replied back immediately” I know, me too”
I am not sure what is going on in his mind. After going through the whole thing this afternoon, I felt so shamed and felt like he never liked me. I am just a secret admire to him. And he probably thinks I am just a自 作多 情 Chinese girl. Feel so sad and desperate now. Am I just 自 作多 情 ? Is this what he really thinks I am?