To: 贴心宝贝, 给你朋友的几点建议

First, she should find a lawyer. She might be able to qualify for legal aid since her income is much less than the federal poverty level, which was $17,113 annual income for 2 people in 2007. Even though she is not a permanent resident, her child is a U.S. citizen. So, please tell her to never sign papers to give up her custody rights. She should let the court know that her hu*****and abused her and their child, giving only $800 per month for living, which is much less than the amount for basic survival.

Second, she needs to prove to the court that she is a better parent than her hu*****and, that she is able to provide better care to the child. In general, most mothers will get custody for the young child, regardless their financial status. Unless, her hu*****and can prove that she is an unfit mother. In order to win the custody she should try to keep herself calm; she should never display evidence of mental or emotionally instability towards her hu*****and. Therefore, she should not physically attack her hu*****and, or harm herself, but most importantly she should not scream or cry in the courtroom. There are many ways to show emotional instability as well, so she should try her best to avoid excessive behavior in public.

Third, even though I believe that being an independent woman is important, her current situation demands that she take into consideration the importance of her child’s well-being. Winning custody of her child is the most important matter at the moment, and if she can get custody then she will be eligible for child support and alimony. If the income from her alimony and child support is lower than the poverty line then her child will still eligible for welfare. I think it would be helpful for her to take on a side job, such as babysitting at home. This will help her earning extra income, and at the same time she might be able to learn English.

4. Maybe she should contact some social service agencies or Chinese associations to get help as soon as she can. They should be able to give her some guidance, meanwhile she should keep this a secret from her hu*****and. Otherwise, her hu*****and will have time to figure out some other ways to conspire against her.

Sorry, I have to write this in English, since it will take me forever to type all this in Chinese.

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