if i were her, i probably would have done the same

by saying that, i mean:

1. the best bargain tool is to do a comparison. if she indeed has more experience and better communication skills than you and you two are doing the same job, apparently she would compare her compensation to yours. and that would be the strongest evidence to show to the management.

2. i don't think she is attacking you personally and on purpose. more or less, she is just using you as an example to explain what kind of situation she is in.

if i were her, i might have done the same thing. if you were her, maybe you would have done it too. nobody, both the management or your co-workers, would take it as a personal attack (badmouthing) to you from her, but just to consider whether the company has treated her fairly.