You have two cows.

SOCIALISM

You have 2 cows.

You give one to your neighbour.



COMMUNISM

You have 2 cows.

The State takes both and gives you some milk.



FASCISM

You have 2 cows.

The State takes both and sells you some milk.



NAZISM

You have 2 cows.

The State takes both and shoots you.



BUREAUCRATISM

You have 2 cows.

The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away...



TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM

You have two cows.

You sell one and buy a bull.

Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.

You sell them and retire on the income.



SURREALISM

You have two giraffes.

The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.



AN AMERICAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.

Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.



ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM

You have two cows.

You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public then buys your bull.



A FRENCH CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You go on strike, organise a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.



A JAPANESE CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called 'Cowkimon' and market it worldwide.



A GERMAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.



AN ITALIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.

You decide to have lunch.



A RUSSIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You count them and learn you have five cows.

You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.

You count them again and learn you have 2 cows.

You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.



A SWISS CORPORATION

You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you.

You charge the owners for storing them.



A CHINESE CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You have 300 people milking them.

You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.

You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.



AN INDIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

You worship them.



A BRITISH CORPORATION

You have two cows.

Both are mad.



AN IRAQI CORPORATION

Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.

You tell them that you have none.

No-one believes you, so they bomb the shit out of you and invade your country.

You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy...



AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION

You have two cows.

Business seems pretty good.

You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.



A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION

You have two cows.

The one on the left looks very attractive...

所有跟帖： 

• 请逐行翻译． -萧跑跑- ♂ (0 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 18:45:33

• 能不能用通俗的语言重贴一遍？ -001- ♂ (10 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 18:47:23

• 你吃了两头奶牛 -臭鼬，花花的- ♀ (0 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 18:51:20

• 弄半天 4042 字节就这么个意思？ -001- ♂ (0 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 18:52:58

• I have a burger. I have 2 cows. -臭鼬，花花的- ♀ (26 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 19:00:46

• I have curry tomato cow mince -马大善人- ♂ (0 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 19:37:40

• 你没有安装google bar???? -澳贼- ♂ (0 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 18:58:14

• when the hell your english become so 2 cow? -马大善人- ♂ (0 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 18:49:16

• please use proper english!!! too cow! ok? -臭鼬，花花的- ♀ (0 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 18:59:14

• hahaha ~~~ -purplenight- ♀ (0 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 18:52:40

• 澳坛 -tagheur- ♂ (115 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 18:53:44

• You have none cows, you borrowed money at top -purplenight- ♀ (447 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 19:02:08

• my 澳坛 version: -Rafale- ♂ (212 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 19:21:32

• hehe, spot on -tagheur- ♂ (52 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 19:24:12

• moving home, still disconnected -Rafale- ♂ (0 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 19:35:29

• 原来你就是ANZ广告里面那个小胖子 -金枪布道- ♂ (0 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 19:55:15

• maybe, maybe not -tagheur- ♂ (19 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 19:58:45

• Here you go... -金枪布道- ♂ (206 bytes) () 10/14/2008 postreply 21:26:56