I will answer your question 1. $950 is expensive, but right now all the price is around that range from DC to HNL. Cheapest price is less than $500.
I would suggest you buying package directly if you don't have free lodging. Package have some discounts, a few hundred bucks off. You can buy flight and hotel for 2 adults, kids can stay free with you in the same room in some hotels. You can buy air tickets seperately for kids.
Another thought is you can break down the trips like IAD-LAX then LAX-HNL, the total may be cheaper than $950.
