FIND YOUR OWN “WHY”
To maximize your chances of sticking to a goal, you need to figure out exactly why you are pursuing that objective in the first place. The self-determination theory posits that individuals feel most fulfilled when they are meeting their essential psychological needs: a sense of competence, relatedness to other people and, most important, autonomy, or the sense of freely choosing what you do. If one is only motivated by external pressure, sooner or later you are bound to rebel and sabotage your own needs.
In a study, overweight women who had been encourages to explore their personal motivations and to choose their own goals exercised far more, and lost significantly more weight, by the three-year mark than woman who did not tap into their autonomy.
TAKE IT SLOW AND STEADY
Another key to making lasting changes is to start modestly and work up to bigger challenges gradually----the way successful running regimens urge couch potatoes to start by walking and to pick up the pace little by little over a few weeks. The gradual approach works because it boosts an essential ingredient in goal achievement: the confidence that you have what it takes to succeed despite real-world difficulties.
Lasting changes ultimately requires making the new behavior automatic. One way to start the habit-forming process is to spell out yourself when, where and how you plan to reach your goals. The point is to create an automatic cue to prompt the behavior you want.
REACH YOUR HOLLY GRAIL
Not the tools mentioned works for every one. For instance, past research has shown that implementation intentions do not work as well for deeply ingrained habits.
It takes great effort and specific plans to form new habits, and you must not see your first lapse as a sign of failure.The goal you set should truly be your own, not based on somebody else's values. Perhapse, most important, do not expect to change your ways overnight-even if the night in question is New Year's eve. It's never the wrong to start taking steps towards a better you.
FUlL PAPER was at 'scientific american mind', March/April, 2012
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