无则加勉哈,我翻译的话估计达不到你的水平。

来源: 小钊 2013-05-03 13:19:47 [] [旧帖] [给我悄悄话] 本文已被阅读: 次 (2172 bytes)
回答: 翻译习作:甜言蜜语VS良药苦口林卡2013-05-02 15:49:39
Sweetened Words V.S. Bitter-sweet Pills
(Sweetened Words vs. Bitter-sweet Pills)


Just saw a comment from a fellow Chinese in a forum saying there is a lack of natural praise in our culture. I think it’s so true.
(I saw a comment made by a fellow Chinese saying there is a lack of natural praise in our culture. I can't agree more.)

The way North Americans relate to each other generally focuses on finding others’ merits to give praise, boosting people’s self-confidence and encouraging them for self-motivation. 
(The way westerners relate to each other generally focuses on finding merits to give praise, boosting self-confidence and promoting self-motivation.)

In contrast, traditionally, Chinese tend to point out people’s shortcomings (including their own) to give criticism, believing in that bitter pills have a wholesome effect and will eventually bring sweetness in people’s life. 
(In contrast, we tend to point out shortcomings (including our own,) believing in that bitter pills have a wholesome effect and will eventually bring sweeetness.)

Guard against arrogance, they would say, so we can always stay humble and strive to improve ourselves. 
("Guard against arrogance and stay humble," we would say, so we will focus on making improvement. )

Both approaches are with good intentions.  The people at the other end who hear those comments, either positive or negative, may feel quite differently. 
(Both approaches are well-intentioned, but the receivers of the comments may benefit quite differently.)

只看了译文,感觉缺点如下:
1. “people”这词出现太多,有点罗嗦;
2. 表述主体和受众对象移动不定;Chinese是we还是they
3. Both approaches are with good intentions. The people at the other end who hear those comments, either positive or negative, may feel quite differently. 这两句之间衔接不好,下文也不是feeling,所以“may feel quite differently"不确切。
4. 缩写和标点也有些不当。

所有跟帖: 

太感动了。这多少字之师了都:)。 -林卡- 给 林卡 发送悄悄话 林卡 的博客首页 (428 bytes) () 05/03/2013 postreply 14:01:18

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