ZT--论君子：亨利·纽曼

君子（节译）　　　　作者：亨利·纽曼

 

    真正的君子在与其周围的关系上也必同样避免产生龃龉与冲突——诸如一切意见的冲撞、感情的抵牾、一切拘束、猜忌、抑郁、愤懑，等等；他所最关心的乃是人人心情舒畅，自由自在。他的心思总是关注着全体人们；对于腼腆的，他便温柔些；对于隔膜的，他便和气些；对于荒唐的，他便宽容些；他对正在和自己谈话的人属于什么脾气，能时刻不忘；他对那些不合时宜的事情或话题都能尽量留心，以防刺伤对方；另外在交谈时既不突出自己，也不令人厌烦。当他施惠与他人时，他尽量把这件事做的平坦，仿佛他自己是个受者而非施者。他一般从不提起自己，除非万不得已；他绝不靠反唇相讥来维护自己；他把一切诽谤流言都不放在心上；他对一切有损于自己的人从不轻易怪罪，另外对各种行为言论也总是尽量善为解释。在与人辩论时丝毫也不鄙视偏狭，即不无道理的抢占上风，也不把个人意气与尖刻词语当成论据，或在不敢明言时恶毒暗示。

  如果他与人涉入任何问题之争时，他那训练有素的头脑总不至于使他出现一些聪明但缺乏教养的人所常犯的那种冒失无礼的缺点；这类人仿佛一把钝刀那样，只知乱砍一通，但却不中肯綮，他们往往把辩论的要点弄错，把气力虚抛在一些琐细上面，或者对自己的对手并不理解，因而把问题弄得更加复杂。  （高建译）

 

原文

 

John Henry Newman - A Definition of a Gentleman

 

HENCE it is that it is almost a definition of a gentleman to say he is one who never inflicts pain. This description is both refined and, as far as it goes, accurate. He is mainly occupied in merely removing the obstacles which hinder the free and unembarrassed action of those about him; and he concurs with their movements rather than takes the initiative himself. His benefits may be considered as parallel to what are called comforts or conveniences in arrangements of a personal nature: like an easy chair or a good fire, which do their part in dispelling cold and fatigue, though nature provides both means of rest and animal heat without them. The true gentleman in like manner carefully avoids what-ever may cause a jar or a jolt in the minds of those with whom he is cast; ・all clashing of opinion, or collision of feeling, all restraint, or suspicion, or gloom, or resentment; his great concern being to make every one at their ease and at home. He has his eyes on all his company; he is tender towards the bashful, gentle towards the distant, and merciful towards the absurd; he can recollect to whom he is speaking; he guards against unseasonable allusions, or topics which may irritate; he is seldom prominent in conversation, and never wearisome. He makes light of favours while he does them, and seems to be receiving when he is conferring. He never speaks of himself except when compelled, never defends himself by a mere retort, he has no ears for slander or gossip, is scrupulous in imputing motives to those who interfere with him, and interprets every thing for the best. He is never mean or little in his disputes, never takes unfair advantage, never mistakes personalities or sharp sayings for arguments, or insinuates evil which he dare not say out. From a long-sighted prudence, he observes the maxim of the ancient sage, that we should ever conduct ourselves towards our enemy as if he were one day to be our friend. Ile has too much good sense to be affronted at insults, he is too well employed to remember injuries, and too indolent to bear malice. He is patient, forbearing, and resigned, on philosophical principles; he submits to pain, because it is inevitable, to bereavement, because it is irreparable, and to death, because it is his des-tiny. If he engages in controversy of any kind, his disciplined intellect preserves him from the blundering discourtesy of better, perhaps, but less educated minds; who, like blunt weapons, tear and hack instead of cutting clean, who mistake the point in argument, waste their strength on trifles, misconceive their adversary, and leave the question more involved than they find it. He may be right or wrong in his opinion, but he is too clear-headed to be unjust; he is as simple as he is forcible, and as brief as he is decisive. Nowhere shall we find greater candour, consideration, indulgence: he throws himself into the minds of his opponents, he accounts for their mistakes. He knows the weakness of human reason as well as its strength, its province and its limits. If he be an unbeliever, he will be too profound and large-minded to ridicule religion or to act against it; he is too wise to be a dogmatist or fanatic in his infidelity. He respects piety and devotion; he even supports institutions as venerable, beautiful, or useful, to which he does not assent; he honours the ministers of religion, and it contents him to decline its mysteries without assailing or denouncing them. He is a friend of religious toleration, and that, not only because his philosophy has taught him to look on all forms of faith with an impartial eye, but also from the gentleness and effeminacy of feeling, which is the attendant on civilization.

Not that he may not hold a religion too, in his own way, even when he is not a Christian. In that case his religion is one of imagination and sentiment; it is the embodiment of those ideas of the sublime, majestic, and beautiful, without which there can be no large philosophy. Sometimes he acknowledges the being of God, sometimes he invests an unknown principle or quality with the attributes of perfection. And this deduction of his reason, or creation of his fancy, he makes the occasion of such excellent thoughts, and the starting-point of so varied and systematic a teaching, that he even seems like a disciple of Christianity itself. From the very accuracy and steadiness of his logical powers, he is able to see what sentiments are consistent in those who hold any religious doctrine at all, and he appears to others to feel and to hold a whole circle of theological truths, which exist in his mind no otherwise than as a number of deductions.