it is wellington style raining again in Xmas day. that make me feel worse about xmas.all shop closing down plus bad weather make everyone annoyed.at least , it annoys me. i have been escaping from susan's invitation for many times. only reason is that her place is 20 minutes away from my place. you can imagine how lazy i am. susan describe me "negative". everytime she asks me out to meet different people. i always look for excuse to avoid it. i know it is not good. but i am happy to do that though. however, i can't run away this time, since i have done so many times to her. it is really not respectful. she got two party tonight. i am not planning to go with her. i just wanna give her xmas gift and then go home. that is only what i want. susan always says to people don't make someone else do what they don't want. but she always ask me to do what i don't want. i know it is good to me. i really need change. but change always come with uncomfortableness.

arriving at her house, the living room is so massy.it is totaly different from last time.(sleepy, i didn't sleep last night. to be continued)