to worrytree, regarding ur daughter's essay.

来源: 2018-12-01 05:34:07 [] [旧帖] [给我悄悄话] 本文已被阅读: 次 (1315 bytes)
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Open a new post because I really think this is a very bad essay for college application. If it is just a homework or practice writing, this is a really good essay, as it shows clearly her deep-inheart feeling. If it is for college application, I suggest change it.

It clearly shows the struggling feeling from the kid. U know what does "struggling" mean? Sometime it means "being twisted" already. Nobody likes negative feeling; this article even shows some darkness. Many ABC kids here have had similar experience, however, most of them are very sunny and still are very happy to accept the challenge. I do not think the AO would like to take chance to accept a student that might have been already twisted in her early life. Like just said above, most ABC kids do not have a such negative feeling. Everybody needs to work hard, not only ABC, but also people of every other race.

Remember, an essay for college application is not for writing competetition. Like everything in the adult world, if one wants to get something from others, one needs to present the best, most attractive parts to the other side. You can say this is pakaging; nothing is wrong with pakaging, as we adult are doing it daily; as long as do not lie.

My 2 cents.



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所有跟帖: 

Agree,我也把我楼下的意见帖上来。 -加州阳光123- 给 加州阳光123 发送悄悄话 加州阳光123 的博客首页 加州阳光123 的个人群组 (478 bytes) () 12/01/2018 postreply 05:38:06

i am afraid this is the true feeling of the girl, which -Smart- 给 Smart 发送悄悄话 Smart 的个人群组 (288 bytes) () 12/01/2018 postreply 05:41:10

担心树,关于你女儿的文章。 -又当爹来又当妈- 给 又当爹来又当妈 发送悄悄话 又当爹来又当妈 的博客首页 又当爹来又当妈 的个人群组 (6100 bytes) () 12/01/2018 postreply 05:39:20

你牛 -Chauhan- 给 Chauhan 发送悄悄话 Chauhan 的个人群组 (0 bytes) () 12/01/2018 postreply 05:41:12

高人啊! -study169- 给 study169 发送悄悄话 study169 的个人群组 (0 bytes) () 12/01/2018 postreply 05:42:04

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