yes, you are right, I know, I should NOT force

my hu*****and; but if I said no to my parents, I feel guilty.

but when I realize 350,000rmb is just a beginning, I need to re-think my decision. I don't have N * 350,000rmb to give. I have my own life.

Maybe there is no result. Just want to speak it out, and feel a relief somehow....