回复:心碎

来源: yesIbelieve 2009-01-12 08:20:08 [] [旧帖] [给我悄悄话] 本文已被阅读: 次 (2139 bytes)
本文内容已被 [ yesIbelieve ] 在 2010-09-28 08:04:20 编辑过。如有问题,请报告版主或论坛管理删除.
The best solution for this unforunate even is to ask Agent K (man in black) to flash his light for you, and you can forget all about it. Unfortunately, that is not available in reality, not yet.

The truth is no matter what you choose, you can not go back, your life is changed forever, period!

So what you need to do is to calm down, give yourself plenty of time, to think what is the best choice for you and your children.

I agree with Lavanda, if you think you two have good foundation, if there is still many characters that you admire in him, if his regret is heartfelt, if he is willing to give up some of his freedom to win your trust back, if he can give your extra tenderness to compensate your hurt feeling... it will be easier for you to forgive him, and move on. However, chances are you can forgive, but never completely forget, although memories will fade will time to certain degree. I have heard a story like this: a man betrayed his wife in middle age, and just few days before the man die of old age, the man complained to his friends, his wife still beat him up on things he did 30 years ago. I do not think this is because the woman is particularly narrow-minded.

If for whatever reason, you can not live together with him any more, then do not be afraid. People in America have opportunity to get married again in all ages. However you have to bear in mind the future family you will have will not be the same as the family you have either. For one thing, you have your own kids, he probably have his own as well. There are many families like this in 垮坛. There will be problems, because everyone has his/her own agenda. Most families fight over it, and it is consider to be a success if the new partner do not interfere the relationship between you and your children, very very few new partner can realy care your child. So over children issue, most likely he can not cheer or bear suffering together with you.

If you feel you do not know what to do yet, give yourself more time. One day your heart will tell you what to do. Follow your heart.

Wish you all the best!

所有跟帖: 

One more thing, -yesIbelieve- 给 yesIbelieve 发送悄悄话 (161 bytes) () 01/12/2009 postreply 08:46:21

好文!非常具体。 -千年缘- 给 千年缘 发送悄悄话 (0 bytes) () 01/12/2009 postreply 09:23:59

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