If you do, you are looking for something that does not exist.
You just want to be your mother's child. That is no longer possible. It has become memory, treasure it as what it is.
Longing for your mother's love now can only serve as a distraction from your real problems, which you may not be willing to face.
What is under your control is YOUR capacity TO love. You may feel that you've already loved enough by the things you do for them everyday. But your situation may require more than that.
If your love comes with an implicit contract, which is that you would be loved back as a result, more often than not, you would be disappointed, because the expectation often cannot be matched. Are you loving your children as your mother loved you?
Love in a marriage and a mother's love for her children are not the same thing.
Love yourself first, before expecting others to love you.
(Loving yourself is your own responsibility. Do not run away from it. It may require you to be conscious of the reflexes you have been conditioned since childhood. It may even be frightening. The protection you have been used to is not here anymore. But it would lead to a better outcome if you step up.)
