My experience to share

Hi,
The following is what I got from my own experience through the case between State vs. My ex-BF which has just got dismissed in NJ yesterday.
Hope it will help.

From your description, it seems that you are charged by police as a case of YOU vs. State.
If time permit, ask your wife to see the prosecutor or district attorney (in the municipal court or county court) to explain that your wife does not want to press charges against you. And if possible, she should minimize the severity of the accident. But keep in mind, she should not withdraw whatever she told to the police, or say anything conflicting with her initial testimony.

From your side, you should go to the court, and ask the judge for the Anger Management Counseling Program, just like you need a counselor to help you in anger management, marriage counseling, etc. With which the judge will carry-over the case in about 6 months or one year. During which you just participate the program, and your counselor will periodically write a letter to the court to confirm your participation of the counseling program, and confirm your improvement. When you finish the program, you will get a notice to go to the court again, then and there the Judge usually will dismiss the case, and no criminal record will be left.

Your attitude and behavior should be very important to affect the Judge or the prosecutor to make their decision. Draw attention to that!

Good luck.